An Introduction to Intoxication
by WhereBrokenHeartsLie
Summary: "...You can't love me, can you?" His lips brush against hers, his voice husky and there's something like longing in his dark eyes. She pulls back a little, her hands pressing into his warm chest as she looks at him with those haunting green eyes. And she smiles this sad, broken smile. "...No, I don't think I can," (Dark, smutty and now complete. )
1. Prologue

**Title:** An Introduction to Intoxication

**Summary:** "...You can't love me, can you?" His lips brush against hers, his voice husky and there's something like longing in his dark eyes. She pulls back a little, her hands pressing into his warm chest as she looks at him with those haunting green eyes. And she smiles this sad, broken smile. "...No, I don't think I can,"

**Type:** Multi-chapter, smut

**Pairing (s) :** SakuraxSasori, SasukexSakura, Others

**Warning (s):** Sexual themes, dark themes, abusive language and disturbing images.

**Note:** This is a sequel to Existence written for my most devoted and most beloved fan which will be mentioned later. However, this stands as an independent story and so the one-shot doesn't have to be read in order for this to be read and understood.

* * *

**_For I love you Sasori-kun ;my best fan: This is the only way I can remedy the broken promise. _  
**

**_..._**

**_..._**

"Love?' he asked himself, giving no sense of recognition for that word in the dictionary of his mind. It was the only battle he had lost in life, the only thing that had been snatched away from him, before he could even claim it."  
― Faraaz Kazi, _Truly, Madly, Deeply_

_..._

There are many things she wants to say to him.

Like,_ get the hell out._ Or, w_here have you been all this time? All these wasted years that I spent with a broken friend to look for you? All these passing springs where I sat by a river and tried to cry but couldn't because you-your absence, your departure had left me numb? _Or perhaps, _I'm not sorry you saw me fucking the enemy against this wall- this very wall against which I leaned and you look at me as if you could've loved me. If you tried. _But she says none of that. She reaches for her black dressing gown and pulls it on, finding comfort in the cool feel of the silky material on her bare, naked skin.

Sasori's face is unreadable and Sasuke looks at her- only at her- with those endless eyes, drilling and drilling into the back of her head like they'll find the answers they want in her thick skull. She shakes her hair out a little, assuming a confident look of disdain and indifference before shifting her weight to her right leg, hand propped at her hip. _Casual..casual...be casual...because he can hurt you otherwise. _

"...Uchiha Sasuke?" She begins slowly, casually and Sasori shoots her a look- a warning, if nothing else- and maybe a question...as if, asking (what are you doing ?) "..I thought you were seeking revenge in the far di-"

"What is the fucking meaning of this?" He spits out savagely, his body taut with so much tension that it looks as though, any moment, any fragile moment, he might lash out and destroy many things. His eyes are hooded, dark, like obsidians and she feels a frail sense of sadness as she regards him.

Sasori speaks for her, his voice toneless as he pulls his robes on. "..It's exactly what you think the meaning of this is, Uchiha. We were...what's the lovely word for what we were doing?" He pauses, eyes raking over the Uchiha in a disdainful, pitying way. "...We were fornicating. And as two consenting adults, it's perfectly legal..."

Sasuke's forehead wrinkles for a moment, his eyes never leaving the side of Sakura's face. His fingers clench tightly around his kunai, resisting the urge to lash out at the accursed Puppeteer. Sakura's hair fall around her shoulders in a mess of pink and shadow and her eyes are different- no longer loving, or peaceful, but like ravaged emeralds that have been cast unto the stone too many times. He feels the slow burn of rejection, the terrible realization...that she has moved on. And here he is, stuck, and lost as if someone's ripped the carpet out from under him, or the floor and he's floating in the thick air, hoping he'll make it through the fall. The irony of the situation is not lost on him. Who'd have thought?

His anger is there, coiling in his belly- terrifying and dark and he steps back, inhaling slowly. "...Consorting to fucking the enemy, Sakura?" He snarls carelessly, letting the mask take over, allowing himself to fall into the abyss that he'd just pulled himself out of because...that's safe. That is safe. She flinches lightly- his eyes have been trained to notice such movements and her wild eyes look to him. "..Really, that's a new kind of rebellion..albeit a nice try at this whole facade.."

Her face hardens. "...I should kill you," She says it calmly and coolly, her tone hard, her eyes shifting to Sasori. And though, though he wishes he hadn't, he notices how her gaze softens, her eyes losing that determined, ugly look to hurt and melt over the tall figure of the redhead.

Sasori, oblivious to the slight changes in her behaviour and her eyes, straps in his katana and ties the robes at his waist, turning around to glance at the Uchiha again, in that sad, pitying way. "...Pleasure to have met you in such...queer circumstances, Uchiha Sasuke..." He looks regretful for a moment. "...I shall give your respects to Uchiha Itachi,"

And he turns to plant a lingering, fading kiss on the Sakura's lips, almost apologetic as he mutters something to his lover, before he bolts towards the open window, lunging forth into the open air and letting the night swallow him. Sasuke steps back, trying to steel himself- trying to protect himself from the Ache, the Pain...the Desolation but it's there; all of it. The failure of his assassination attempt on his brother, and the futility of his sudden, pathetic realization about his love for..for...He doesn't even know what to call her now and it hurts. It hurts worse than being slashed open by his brother. His hand shakes and he can't look at her so he looks away.

The silence seems to have the words he doesn't and he walks away, stealthily- the same way he came, the memory of her pressed tight to the puppeteer, burned into his mind, making him hurt and hurt and hurt.

At some point, everything just goes numb.

* * *

Outside, Konoha burns.

Deidara's bombs have worked. Miraculously. Zetsu stares out at the exhausting, dark flames and he smiles a satisfied smile because Leader will be happier and maybe, maybe, things will be better. His black side of the face twitches and he raises a slender hand to his cheek, trying to soothe the irritable skin. His body seems as though it might crumble in moments, but there's something incredible inside him- a new kind of knowledge, a terrible kind of truth that only he knows and it gives him this brilliant power and clarity.

His fingers rake through his sooty hair and he watches a woman stumble, crawl and burn to death with a calculated look in his eye. He feels nothing.

Haruno Sakura has been used so well that he feels a small amount of pity for her. Sasori played her well. Leader- rather, Pein hadn't expected anything would come from such a futile, old-fashioned Seduction-style mission...and yet, yet the clever Puppeteer had pulled it off and rather well at that, because even Hidan was impressed.

All the information they'd needed for this Burning came from that supposedly-clever kuniochi. That poor girl was smitten- at least, that's the idea Zetsu got from the amount of information Sasori got from her. His smile turns a little pitying, imagining the girl's crazed anger at the scene that's unfolding in front of him.

Kabuto waves at Zetsu, pulling up one of the screaming people and throwing the charred body into a pile by the trees. The Cherry Blossom's leaves scatter, swirling in the smoky air and to Zetsu, the somewhat cruel scene looks beautiful. The pink petals twist and turn through the thick, heavy air, the only sign of beauty and infinity in this town of desolation. Somewhere, a child screams and still, there's nothing. Sometimes...sometimes, the White Side wants to know what emotion is.

What it would be like, to maybe...feel a little sadness to see this place of life, of prosperity...reduced to meaningless ashes and dead bodies. What it be like, to perhaps even...repent the evil he'd help to inflict. But instead, there's just this raging indifference- this nothingness that allows no entry to anything else. And it's a small comfort he has.

"..We should leave," Kabuto shouts, and Zetsu spots Deidara in the background, his long hair illuminated in the flames.

A tree breaks, swallowed completely by the flames and from behind the carnage and destruction, Sasori appears, his dark robes fluttering in the wind. Zetsu watches the stride of the Puppeteer increase a little as he spots his long-haired partner and he wonders what the kuniochi will be doing right this very moment. A pink petal twirls, landing on the flat of his hand which he'd held out to feel the flames, to assess the heat.

He looks at it, and somehow, can't smile.

* * *

Sakura feels disoriented.

But the slight stench of smoke, the brightness casting shadows along the blank walls of her apartment calls to her and she disregards everything, turning around to walk over to the window from where Sasori jumped off. Her stomach lurches, her saliva tasting bitter to her. Her hands shake lightly as she nears the window, looking down. A part of her wants to see. And a part doesn't. Like the times an accident victim is brought in and she feels this tug-of-war inside her; the urgent need to know what's happened, and the need not to see the vile injuries inflicted upon the poor boy, or the poor old woman. And the feeling's here.

What she sees isn't what she thought she would see.

All of her village is burning.

She blinks, as if blinking will make the horror less real and the pieces join together in her head easily, quickly, with morbid ease- like when she has a dying patient at her hands and her only job is to keep the patient happy, or calm, or something in the middle so at least the death that comes is easy and sweet. Her eyes burn, the sting of tears achingly familiar as she looks at the familiar houses caught in the flames, the smoke thick and dark as it rises up into the air. The only thing she manages to see, that has survived the horror, is the Cherry Blossom and somehow, that doesn't seem right. Everything should be burning.

She catches sight of shadows, shadows of men she'd thought this village would never see. The Akatsuki are here, in Konoha, destroying everything she's ever known.

Her hand reaches forward for the ledge, but she's falling and falling and falling and nothing can stop the fall.

And she understands then, that she is just as responsible as any of the criminals for the death of her home.

* * *

**A/N:**

**I hope it goes on..this story. I really, really want it to be good. Please read and review. I will try not to disappoint. Thank you to the one person who pushed me to write this. I will not be brekaing promises this time. **

**Oooh, Happy New Year too!**


	2. I: Another Pair of Corrupted Lungs

**Title:** An Introduction to Intoxication

**Summary:** "...You can't love me, can you?" His lips brush against hers, his voice husky and there's something like longing in his dark eyes. She pulls back a little, her hands pressing into his warm chest as she looks at him with those haunting green eyes. And she smiles this sad, broken smile. "...No, I don't think I can,"

**Type:** Multi-chapter, smut

**Pairing (s) :** SakuraxSasori, SasukexSakura, Others

**Warning (s):** Sexual themes, dark themes, abusive language and disturbing images.

**Note:** This is a sequel to Existence written for my most devoted and most beloved fan which will be mentioned later. However, this stands as an independent story and so the one-shot doesn't have to be read in order for this to be read and understood. I hope to God that you enjoy it.

* * *

**I**: _Another Pair of Corrupted Lungs_

_..._

_"She couldn't get any farther away inside from her skin. She couldn't get away."  
― _Cynthia Voigt, When She Hollers

.

_"Whatever is done for love is beyond good and evil..."_

- Friedrich Nietzsche

...

Everything burns.

And Sasuke watches everything drift away into the curls of grey smoke and the endless sky seems sweeter, glittering lightly, almost laughing at the destruction raging below it. His eyes catch sight of a child, stumbling through the flames, calling out to his mother and his body moves at its own accord, his long legs carrying him across the dying village towards the little shadow. He feels his stomach turn nervously, as he recalls Sasori's smirk, Sakura's trusting look and everything seems to make so much sense that his head begins to hurt and he hates himself for letting everything to get to him. He lets his thoughts slip away and reaches the body, just as a log of burning wood sears through behind him. He reaches forward and the boy flinches, his eyes big and sad.

It strikes Sasuke...that it's almost as if, he's looking at a younger, terrified version of himself.

Shaking away the sudden anger that rises from that callous thought, he lifts the boy easily and looks around himself at the burning inferno. He doesn't even remember the way to Naruto's house. If only he could- what? Do what? Be the saviour? His fingers clench around the boy's thin frame and the little boy seems to understand that this man won't hurt him and he lays his head onto Sasuke's shoulder, giving away his trust as easily as one would spare a friend some change. Sasuke's obsidian eyes seem glassy and he makes for a sad Saviour. He's just a monster. He can't do this. He can't. But he does it, anyway. He leaps over a pile of burning wood, catching the vague, fleeting sight of a dying, screaming woman before he lands on a patch of untouched ground.

The image of the dying woman makes his body feel weak, his head lightheaded.

The boy trembles in his arms, holding him tightly as if Sasuke will protect him from the maniacs who have done this to the Village and somehow, somehow, the Uchiha finds himself wishing for the sacrificial love that Naruto possesses, or the desperate need to help that Sakura once had because he's none of those things. He's a sad, monstrous version of the caring boy he once used to be and this- this burning place is not the right time, the right location for him to come to a realization. He needs to get the boy out of here. That's all the matters. First the boy, then the others. Whoever else is out there, burning, pulling at their burning clothes, aching for respite, or perhaps quick death.

He turns but the flames are angrier, darker and he seems the faint outlines of grown men- the red symbol that has haunted his nights one too many times and he understands everything. His saliva, suddenly, seems to taste bitter and his nails dig into the heated, soft skin of the boy's sides. And the boy weeps into his robes, unable to do much else. There. There, against the darkness, he sees Sakura's hair first. The pink, pink hair that he so often wished he could run his fingers through. She's walking towards him and he feels a morbid sense of pity for her. That she's been betrayed by the Puppeteer.

The Akatsuki is eerily outlined by the flames before vanishing, one by one and it's almost as if the Village set itself on fire. His eyes shift back towards the walking figure of Sakura, which seems determined and undeterred, and he notices that there are more people behind her. A struggling group of stragglers, it seems, but people nonetheless, and there's the vague rush of Hope inside him. He feels infinitely troubled, and relieved. Things will be fine.

What he doesn't realize and see...is the smoke; curling around them, swallowing them up just as Sakura's face comes into his view. And then vanishes. This smoke is ugly, and black and so thick that he can't even see his feet as he looks down at where they should be. His body shakes for a moment, and he worries, he worries and digs his hands into the boy's body, holding him tightly, refusing to relent and give in but the smoke is travelling up into his nose, pressing against his eardrums and he can't hear anything but the sobbing of the child in his arms. It's a terrible, terrible sound.

Somehow, he can't seem to breathe. The air isn't there. But it was. He can't feel it, in front of him, but he can't move. His legs are made of lead and refuse to cooperate with his brain. His body is drifting, submitting and the smoke engulfs him. His knees buckle, his mouth open as he coughs, choking on his spittle, holding the boy- holding him tight enough to smother him himself, and he wants to make sure...

...make sure...mak...

* * *

Naruto wants to scream.

He does. But he has this heavy mask on his face, and two katanas in both hands and he's walking beside his only friend and he thinks that this is what death must feel like. Or dying, really. As the flames rise up around them, Sakura walks on blindly, stumbling over the Dead and calling out orders to the only people left. His body is reluctant, but his brain is alert and everything seems distant. As if it's not really happening and it's all a bad dream that he can't wake up from. But he will wake. Eventually. When morning comes.

But this is real. This is happening. To the place he's loved so much that his love for it is worn and tired. Sakura has one of the masks, and her eyes are bloodshot, as if she's been crying, but it could be the pills, or the lack of sleep. She has her demons to fight. He doesn't ask about them. The only thing she's said to him during the course of this...nightmare are the words that come back to him, echoing in his hollow mind, scaring him.

_Sasuke's here. Back in...in Konoha. He's out there, somewhere and we have to find him._

As the tall silhouette of a man falls, crumpling, he wonders who did this. There's only one group who could pull this off and that's the Akatsuki. But how would they have gotten past the guards? And the walls? And the traps that lie waiting for enemies around the borders of the village? How could they have known that Tsunade would be out in Sound this very night? That the ANBU would have sent half of its troops to Sand to give them some special training knowledge? How could they know any of that? There's a simple answer to that one. Someone from Konoha must have told them.

Two men, unrecognizable because of the masks, put out a burning hut and there's the man who crumpled two moments and a lifetime ago. Sakura rushes forward, calling out to her medics in a low, urgent voice. There's another team that's putting out the deadly fires swiftly and Naruto stands back as the medics rush forth, calling out to more and he notices the child in the man's arms. He recognizes the dark, midnight hair and his stomach clenches, as he takes another rushed step back. Considering the air safe to breathe now, the flames less dangerous, everything strange, he pulls the mask off and looks around at his world dying around him.

He wills himself not to die with it, too.

He inhales the destruction, eyes on his former best friend and Ino walks up to him, holding her mask tightly, her cerulean eyes dark and indecipherable as she looks down at the man whose better version once broke her heart. She shifts when the stretcher is rushed past her, the medics running swiftly towards the make-shift tent that's been set up not so long ago. The child is gone and Sakura's crouched down next to the unconscious Uchiha, speaking urgently to Neji, who's pulling out handcuffs and shouting something to somebody. To Naruto, everything is surreal.

Until- until Ino puts her hand on his shoulder, almost (nearly) waking him from his reverie and speaks in a voice that isn't like hers.

"...There's a traitor in this village," She says something they both know, unable to look away from the dark flames burning into the night. "...and more than half of the people...a-are dead...I...it's just...how could someone do this?"

"The Akatsuki are good at killing, Ino," He says quietly and maybe it's because he sounds so calm, or because he looks sane and unaffected that Ino finally looks at him, hoping for strength. "..It's the traitor who's the real...criminal. Knowing what would happen if the Akatsuki were to acquire privileged information...this person...I.." He trails off, getting caught up in his new-found hatred for the rat who's told the bastards everything they wanted to know.

"I.." Ino stops again, a slow, dreadful tear slipping down her cheek. "...I couldn't find Sai, or Kakashi-sama. And Naruto," She stops again, her voice breaking into a low sob. She sucks in a ragged breath, pushing her hair out of her face. "...Hinata's missing too.."

He flinches at that. Just a little. But Ino knows. She can see. They both look away and down at the handcuffed Uchiha, coughing lightly as a light-haired medic speaks to him in short, curt words. Someone's shouting about more dead bodies and a team of survivors sprints off towards the location, brave enough to do the recognizing and cataloging of the Dead. Ino's hand shifts down his arms and curls around his limp one and she gives him a squeeze. But there is no comfort to be found.

_Sai. Kakashi. Hinata._

And so many more. So many others. Names swirl around in his head, anger pulsing within him.

Ino rests her head against his shoulder, holding him tightly and they watch everything they once loved burn to ash.

* * *

"..I'm fucking impressed, you doll-faced bastard," Hidan calls out chirpily, taking down his sake in one go, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand with a lewd smirk on his face."..How was the sex with that bitch?"

Sasori's face displays nothing but Zetsu notes the slight clenching of Sasori's fingers and understands that the comment, though a compliment, is really just a jab and it pricks the Puppeteer but he can't show it. Zetsu also sees the slight colour-change in the Puppeteer's eyes, and Deidara takes a seat beside his partner, drinking down his sake with a satisfied, lazy smile. Kabuto is nowhere to be seen and Itachi lies, reclining on the couch, eyes shut, body taut. Zetsu sees it all. Konan will be with Leader, laughing about victory.

"...Keep your mouth fucking shut," Sasori finally says impassively, and Tobi appears from behind the shadows, his mask ominous in the faint light of dawn, a glass of sake in his own hand.

"..Hey...hey..boys," Deidara clucks, pouring himself another glass and laughing loudly, as if dismissing the foul words that the two have spat at each other. "..Today, we celebrate our victory and try not to fight...so, Sasori-danna," He nods at his partner, "..and Hidan," He gestures vaguely. "..are to not to communicate with each other if they have to communicate that way..."

"Fuck you, you little pussy-fag," Hidan snaps angrily at the blonde, pulling the bottle away from Deidara and pouring himself another cup. "...You're all fucking pussies- especially that redhead with his fucking indifference shit thing..."

Tobi chuckles darkly and Zetsu catches sight of dark, familiar eyes in the mask before Tobi turns and the moment of recognition passes into nothing.

Itachi finally shifts, rising from his state of rest and looking around at the group. He bows his head respectfully in the general direction of Sasori and speaks in his polite, perfectly-calm voice. "...Your card was played well, Sasori-san. Leader-sama will be greatly pleased by the success of our mission,"

Sasori nods politely back at Itachi, his eyes meeting the onyx ones with a slight reluctance because they remind him- remind him of Uchiha Sasuke who'd looked at...no, he wouldn't- He refuses to think of her. Kisame walks in, yawning slightly and stretching just as Sasori says respectfully, "..Thank you, Uchiha-san. I appreciate your praise and hope that my part in this mission will aid our Greater Goal,"

Itachi looks at the redhead for a long moment, communicating something telepathically, and he gets to his feet, strolling out of the small common room into the new morning. Sasori follows him out, sucking in a shaky breath because in all honesty, being around the older Uchiha makes him nervous and he's already so nervous about explaining everything to Leader-sama. The training grounds have been freshly mowed and there's the neat smell of Cherry Blossoms in the air and it reminds him of the very thing he's trying to forget and he discards his thoughts easily, despising himself for his weakness.

"How is my brother, Sasori-san?" The older Uchiha finally says and his voice is cool, sleek, his chiseled frame tall in the faint, nervous morning light.

"Smitten," He says honestly. "..Smitten with the her but well otherwise,"

"Smitten?" Itachi speaks curiously, his eyes crinkling and Sasori thinks that it's the closest that the older Uchiha has come to smiling. "..With Haruno Sakura?"

"Yes," Hearing her name makes him clench his fingers tightly into a fist, his stomach clenching tightly- making his head spin suddenly and terrifyingly. He looks out at the rise of the new day, thinking back to the flames and how this place is so free of that destruction.

"My brother was always a fool," Itachi laughs lightly- his laughter cruel and mocking. "...But it seems the years away, as he remembers his failures, he has become a greater fool..." The older Uchiha turns to Sasori, his eyes still and solemn, his mouth grimly set. "...I hope, Sasori-san, that you learn something from my brother's foolish behaviour. Remember that it never ends well for a man who has lost himself to a woman who is more loyal to her village than herself,"

The intimidating gaze of the Uchiha nearly- nearly makes Sasori flinch; the words seem to be a warning and for a second, a second, Sasori thinks that Itachi knows. That Itachi, somehow, as soulless and Godless as he is, has figured out that this redheaded sinner before him is torn between fear and love and that the only thing that's kept him sane is that girl- that girl with her gentle touch, her insistent gaze. But Itachi looks away and resumes his still position, smiling vaguely- eerily, at the blood-red sun at climbs the sky with the promise of life going on still.

"Do not consign me to doomed human emotions, Itachi-san," He says in a voice that doesn't sound like the things he's feeling. "...I may have gained mortality, but things as fickle as the love of a woman do not tempt me,"

Itachi seems to be satisfied.

The silence is painless- comfortable and Sasori's mind is back there, in that dark room, looking at Sakura's pale face as she catches sight of Sasuke. As her viridian eyes widen, sad and furious all at once- betrayal splayed across her face. He wonders...he wonders, how he will be able to look her in the eye ever again. Hopefully, that damned day will never come.

Itachi turns again, his eyes a little darker than before and tips his head to one side. "...So you say,"

* * *

"What is the purpose of your return to Konoha?" Naruto hisses malevolently, his blue eyes not so kind as Sasuke had remembered, his face not as friendly as Sasuke had once recalled; this man who stands before him is not his friend. Not anymore.

"Redemption," He answers in the most honest way, because it's what he's come for, hasn't he?

"How dare you say- how dare you speak of forgiveness?" Naruto's tone is darker, his eyes swirling dangerously with red but Sasuke has forgotten how to be afraid- he lost all the fear within him not so many years ago.

"I-"

"No," Naruto cuts in sharply, slamming Sasuke back into the wall harshly and Ino warns him in a soft voice."No, Sasuke," His former friend snaps, pressing the heel of his hand into Sasuke's flesh, the hatred in his eyes hurting him more than Naruto's beatings ever will. "..You don't get to this right now, when our village has turned to ash and more than half the people are dead! Dead! Do you understand that, you fucking bastard? Or should I give you names? Names of people you fucking walked out on when they were there for you! Kakashi- dead; he burned to death in his fucking bed. Hinata- dead; she was trying to save a four-year old...They're all fucking DEAD!"

That's when Sakura steps in, pulling Naruto back with her brute strength as he struggles, aching to imprint on his best friend's face some more bruises, some more cuts- some kind of vengeance for himself. Naruto's shouting incorrigible things but they sound terrible and Ino takes him by his shoulders and that's when he starts crying. And not in a gentle, soft way.

He lets out a loud, choked sob, his wailing inhuman and chilling all at once and Sasuke sees the tears in Sakura's eyes as he slumps against the wall.

He sucks in a shuddering breath, and as Naruto is taken out, Sasuke knows that he's broken something in his friend that can never be fixed.

The door shuts, cutting out the terrible sound of Naruto's grief and Sakura turns to look at him, right in the eye, unashamed and unaware of the riot of emotions that flood him as he looks back at her. More than anything, there's pity. There's actual, real pity in Sasuke's gaze and Sakura wants nothing more than to pull herself out of her sin and find a place to just sit and mourn her dead. Her prisoner- her captive and he has the nerve to pity her and she knows that he knows.

She's been played. So well. The thought hurts, its conception stemming all other emotions and introducing her to pure, unadulterated heartbreak. Hearts don't actually break- she places a hand on her chest, as if to steady herself, when really, she's just checking if her heart is there, intact and sure enough, it's there, thudding painfully, achingly, reluctantly. There's so much pain inside her head that she feels dizzy. Sasuke's face blurs and she blinks back the tears.

Kakashi- gone. Hinata-gone. Sai-gone. Tenten-gone. Lee-gone. All of them- gone. Swallowed by flames that she allowed in. Victims of her love- her stupidity, her insipid need to attach herself to the one man she should never have trusted. She stills for a moment, gathering strength.

"...I'll have you freed," is all she says to him, her voice wobbling and falling over itself and she's gone, only her musky, sad scent left lingering in the claustrophobic air around him.

He shuts his eyes, resting his head against the wall, knowing he has failed all over again.

* * *

She sits in the ash, below the Cherry Blossom tree, holding Sai's headband in her slender hands that not so long ago pleasured the one man she thought she could help, love and keep forever. Now, now she sees how foolish she's been. She wonders if they're laughing at her now- the Akatsuki, with their dark robes and indifferent attitudes- if they're chuckling at how well their fellow Member managed to drag out all of the Village's secrets from one of the best medic-nins in the country. She hates herself. She really does. She wants to fade away, or just hated by everybody and soon, that'll happen. It's what she deserves. All that her Village had given her- she threw it back in it's face for a man. For a body. For pleasure. She struggles with herself, defeating the urge to scream- to hurt herself so badly that there's no remedy.

She wants to cry. She really does. She looks down at the headband in her hands, a petal landing on her bare knee and it hurts so bad. There's no word to describe the vastness of the ache that surrounds her, that summons her into the abyss and she sinks, letting herself drift into the endless stream of numb, dull pain. She's drowning, but she's still got breath and it doesn't seem right. The crimson sun rises into the yellow sky, promising nothing.

Sakura shuts her eyes, but the tears refuse to come.

* * *

**A/N:**

**_Here it is. Please do review. It'd be welcome and if you choose not to, I won't find out where you live, hunt you down and murder you slowly with a scythe. I won't. I promise. Fare well until the next update, though._**

**_- WBHL_**


	3. II: A Wayward Heart That Beats

**Title:** An Introduction to Intoxication

**Summary:** "...You can't love me, can you?" His lips brush against hers, his voice husky and there's something like longing in his dark eyes. She pulls back a little, her hands pressing into his warm chest as she looks at him with those haunting green eyes. And she smiles this sad, broken smile. "...No, I don't think I can,"

**Type:** Multi-chapter, smut

**Pairing (s) :** SakuraxSasori, SasukexSakura, Others

**Warning (s):** Sexual themes, dark themes, abusive language and disturbing images.

**Note:** This is a sequel to Existence written for my most devoted and most beloved fan which will be mentioned later. However, t

his stands as an independent story and so the one-shot doesn't have to be read in order for this to be read and understood. I hope to God that you enjoy it.

* * *

**II:** _A Wayward Heart That Beats_

_..._

_"Love never dies a natural death. It dies because we don't know how to replenish its source. It dies of blindness and errors and betrayals. It dies of illness and wounds; it dies of weariness, of witherings, of tarnishings."_

**― Anaïs Nin**

...

_"The heart was made to be broken."_  
**― Oscar Wilde**

* * *

"You're lying," He hisses, his eyes so dark that the blue is invisible, barely even there.

"What have I to gain?" Sasuke snarls back, turning his face to the side so that he can spit out the blood in his mouth, his vision blurring lightly for a few fragmented moments.

"Everything," He snaps, wiping off the blood on his knuckles- Sasuke's blood. "You have lost too much to come back here and be honest aout the things that have transpired over the past few days. That's why you're lying about Sakura-chan. That's what you do best. Blaming others. And what you're telling me is complete nonsense. It's a filthy lie that should burn your fucking tongue everytime you speak it, you fucking bastard...to..I...you sicken me!"

Sasuke breathes out deeply through his nose, tightening his fingers around the thin fabric of his long, dirty shirt, trying to dispel the terrible images in his head, his body lying limp against the wall. "...I saw it with my own eyes, Naruto," He begins slowly, calmly, trying to keep his voice low and peaceful even he's raging inside, hoping that he can get his hands on his memories and show them to this angered friend of his. "..She is fucking Sasori and she gave him the information unknowingly..she had no idea that he-"

The next punch blinds him completely for several long minutes, his body twitching as darkness falls over his eyes. His nose hurts, thick blood curling over his chin and dripping onto his shirt and it's not the punch that hurts but the fact that his one best friend- no, his ex-best friend hates him so much that he doesn't want to hear the truth. And if the truth is so dark, so terrible, then why would anyone want to hear it? Sasuke balks, running over all the things he's seen in his head and realizes that there is no way to convince Naruto of Sakura's crime. Part of him just wants to give in to this pain, to surrender to this numbness and float away into the distance- lose himself to the memories that are eating away at his mind. But another part of him is fighting; it's yearning for freedom, for new air though it is full of ash and his lungs hurt with every ragged breath he pulls in.

The kick to his chest leaves him gasping, sprawling forward on the floor. "..Watch what you say, Uchiha...you're on thin ice,"

"..I'm not lying," He spits out more blood, fingers clawing at the hard, cold stone floor. Naruto crouches down, his face a few centimeters from his friend, his eyes unfathomable and cruel.

"..I don't believe you, you two-faced snake," Naruto hisses in a low, brutal tone. "...You're trash-talking about Sakura-chan just to get out of this trouble about traitor shit and whatnot. You sicken me. You're a vile excuse for a human being...you talk about her as if...as- fuck, you're sick, Sasuke. Completely twisted...she loved you all those years and she waited- she waited like you'd actually come back...and this...you..." He trails off, reeling in another punch that leaves Sasuke gasping for air, blood gushing from his nose.

Sasuke struggles with himself. "..I..ask her, Naruto,"

Naruto's face looks dark and menacing in the faint light. "..Fuck you, Uchiha,"

* * *

Kakashi is unrecognizable.

It's funny what the flames can do to a person. His hair is almost gone, singed and sooty and his mouth is open as if he were screaming, or shouting out in his sleep as the fire took him along with hundreds of others. His body- or rather, his corpse is blackened and slack, falling apart on the medial table and the only way that Kiba was able to identify the body was this grey strand of hair that lay beside the...the corpse and the Icha Icha books lying by the charred bed. Sakura looks away, unable to face the...that blackened body of her teacher, her guide, her mentor and her friend. Her fingers clench tightly around the clipboard and she sucks in a sharp breath, blinking back the tears.

"Should we take it away?" One of her juniors asks her, eyes sharp and face unblemished.

_It_. How did Kakashi turn into _It_? He's still there- she can feel his playful aura of mockery and friendliness surround her and swallow her and she feels as if she might fall, as if she might already be falling and falling.

When will she hit the ground?

"..Him," She snaps more harshly than she had intended and one of her juniors flinches at the cool anger in her voice. "..That's a person there...not..not.." She trails off, wiping a stray tear from her eye furiously. It takes her several long silences to get a hold of herself. "..Take _him_ away,"

The juniors lift the desolate form and put it-no, put him on the stretcher and carry the stretcher away. She pulls the doctor's coat, as if telling herself that she is a healer and not a killer and that things can be OK. But she';s seen enough. Enough to make her sure that she has to tell truth. That she has to tell Naruto that she is the mole- the traitor- the betrayer and she will the death that comes to all traitors with dignity and happiness. She's seen Hinata's body, and Tenten's too. She couldn't bear to see Sai's so she asked some others to have a look at it, document the injuries and the body before sending it off for burial. And if there no pieces of the body left then the ash is taken and put into these urns from the museums.

Tsunade will be back tonight. The letters have reached her and she knows that she can't show her face to her greatest teacher when she knows deep down what she's done and how Tsunade will feel about her betrayal.

"Sakura," It's Ino and she's standing at the door, her hair falling outlandishly around her face and her eyes are tired, weary. "..May I come in?"

Sakura shifts so that she can lean back against the window, resting her pink head against the firm glass. "..Of course," She crosses her arms across her chest, sighing softly, unable to express her worry in the right way. "..How is Naruto?"

"Furious, more than anything, at Sasuke," Ino says quietly, her eyes shifting from left to right. "..Naruto's been interrogating him and well, though his ways may be questionable and a little harsh, the answers that Sasuke is giving are less than vulgar and stupid. He's so sick and desperate that he's spreading lies about you, Sakura,"

"Lies...lies about me?" Sakura blinks, as if surprised. "..What's he been saying?"

"He..." Ino stops as if afraid of spilling vile words from her mouth. She puts a strand of hair behind her ear, blinking rapidly. "..he said that you slept with Sasori and through that...liaison, gave him the information he needed to pull this kind of massacre off. He said that you had been betraying the village for a while and that he found you two together...naked...and it...it doesn't- he's lying, isn't he? He's so stupid and insistent and Naruto keeps hitting him because all the lies he's spewing are crazy and Naruto won't stand for it..."

Ino watches Sakura's face but there's nothing there. It's impassive. It's unfathomable. Her friend's eyes shift out to the window, her body straightening a little. "...I've got to talk to him,"

* * *

Sasori pours himself another glass of sake, watching the flames dance across the wall. The drink burns his throat as he takes a long slug at it, his fingers tightening around the cup when his partner walks out of the bathroom and fixes himself at the fireplace in order to observe Sasori. Itachi's gaze is unnerving and since Leader reassigned partners this morning, Itachi's been watching Sasori carefully and eerily, as if he were a predator contemplating the murder of his prey, or simply sizing it up. Itachi's robes flutter in the light afternoon breeze and Sasori shifts, taking down most of the fiery drink with a lopsided smile. Because he has to smile. Victory has been achieved. Victory was all he ever wanted. Victory is what he got. But does he want it now?

He slugs the sake down eagerly, unable to comprehend much beyond the simple fact that he's betrayed the one person he felt like he could love.

"You don't look too happy, Sasori-sama," Itachi finally speaks, drying his long raven locks with a grace that is unusual and mysterious in a place such as this. "...And you're drinking like a man who's lost much..so I gather that you really do-"

"Don't read into things too much, Itachi-sama," He cuts in sharply, managing not to slur his words as he tightens his grip on the sake bottle, his eyes dark and forbidding. ".. I drink all the bloody time and it doesn't mean anything. You're losing your head over this..."

"..I fear my head is safe but your heart is not," Itachi says patiently, as if conversing with a spoilt child who refuses to admit his fault, or folly. "..You've placed yourself in a terrible position, Sasori,"

The absence of the suffix makes Sasori realize that Itachi's never really seen him as an equal, or a respectable adversary, but as a foolish man, or a stupid boy and that makes him angry. He blinks, trying to dispel the urge to beat that lithe smirk off of Itachi's face. "...My loyalty is with Leader-sama. It is with the Akatsuki...You have no right to question it,"

Itachi laughs in a dry, loose manner, his eyes like blanks. "..It is if the Leader asked me to do so,"

* * *

Naruto looks up when she comes in and he feels his heart sinking- literally, falling out of its place into his stomach and settling into his lower abdomen as if it belongs there and he pulls off the bloody bandages on his knuckles, eyeing her warily.

"Naruto..." She says quietly and her eyes are so sad that he has to look away.

"...Is..is it true?" is all he asks, his eyes fixed to the dark walls of the prison control room.

She wavers. Almost. Just enough. "..I...yes. I betrayed the village,"

* * *

**A/N:**

Forgive the shortness of this chapter. Lots of work to do. Thank you for reading it and please do review!


	4. III: Trust the Betrayed

**Title:** An Introduction to Intoxication

**Summary:** "...You can't love me, can you?" His lips brush against hers, his voice husky and there's something like longing in his dark eyes. She pulls back a little, her hands pressing into his warm chest as she looks at him with those haunting green eyes. And she smiles this sad, broken smile. "...No, I don't think I can,"

**Type:** Multi-chapter, smut

**Pairing (s) :** SakuraxSasori, SasukexSakura, Others

**Warning (s):** Sexual themes, dark themes, abusive language and disturbing images.

**Note:** This is a sequel to Existence written for my most devoted and most beloved fan which will be mentioned later. However, this stands as an independent story and so the one-shot doesn't have to be read in order for this to be read and understood. I hope to God that you enjoy it.

* * *

**III:** _Trust The Betrayed _

_..._

_"Witch, do this for me,_  
_Find me a moon_  
_made of longing._  
_Then cut it sliver thin,_  
_and having cut it,_  
_hang it high_  
_above my beloved's house,_  
_so that she may look up_  
_tonight_  
_and see it,_  
_and seeing it, sigh for me_  
_as I sigh for her,_  
_moon or no moon."_  
―** Clive Barker**

...

_"It was a mistake," you said. But the cruel thing was, it felt like the mistake was mine, for trusting you." _  
―** David Levithan, **_  
_

"..Are you trying to save him?" He asks quietly, so quietly that it if weren't for the silence then she wouldn't be able to hear him. He shifts, leaning back against the wall and surveying her easily as if he doesn't really believe her. Because he doesn't.

She moves the weight of her body from her left foot to her right, tipping her head to scrutinize his face- his familiar, loving face. "..No, Naruto," She breathes in, striding forward so that the distance between them lessens. She must look him in the eye and tell him the truth. He looks up as she approaches, his eyes wide and trusting.

She feels herself dying all over again. "..Look, " She begins calmly and his gaze never wavers, only helping in restoring her hate for herself and her weaknesses. "..I..It started about a year ago. Sasori appeared at my window and things got out of hand and we kissed and ended up sleeping together...you know, we..." She stops, scanning his face and it closes up, emotions being swallowed by the lines of skin and bone until she can't read him at all. "...we had sex and it kept happening. At odd intervals. And he would ask me about the walls, sometimes, or the border. Or the guards. And I'd tell him because I didn't see him as an enemy anymore..." She stops again, her voice getting all caught up in the treacherous things she's saying.

He leans back, further and further away, his face impassive, almost hard and his whiskers are prominent in the dim light. When he speaks, his voice is low and harsh. "...Go on- keep talking,"

When he crosses his arms, fixing her with his unwavering, open, unyielding gaze, she takes the hint and spills more. "...I didn't seem him as a threat," She swallows thickly, blinking. "..and so I told him everything about the village, about you and Sasuke and Ino and Kakashi. I told him about my life and he told me things about his...and..somewhere in between, I fell in love with him," When Naruto's face hardens, jaw clenching, she looks away, swallowing another lump and breathing deeply to calm her unsteady nerves. "...I betrayed Konoha, Naruto..."

There is a silence. That eerie, terrible kind of silence that digs deep into everyone's hearts and splits them open only to reinforce The Tragic Truth. It's the type of silence that you'd hear in the Temples, or at a graveyard, or on a battlefield where the dead are lying asleep and tired, or even the silence that befalls a broken town that has been burned to ash by people who have no hearts at all. It's a deadly, thick silence that consumes them both, leaving them rattled and afraid. She wants to break it. She really does. But she has nothing more to say.

That look on Naruto's face. It's an expression she's never likely to forget. It's the look of a man broken, not by the burned village, or the traitor best-friend but by the stupidity of the one person he trusted the most. His eyes are dark and unfocused but they clear instantly, his body shifting so that he towers above her.

"..No...I..." He trails off, his hurt so palpable that she can feel it like static against her skin. "..I..I can't do this.." He pushes past, stumbling, reeling from the shock of it all and she grabs a hold of his arm.

"..Please, Naruto, I just...punish me for it..I..please...pl-"

"I can't do this," He hisses, wrenching his arm from her grasp, turning around to look at her torn expression. "You..I trusted you...I..I can't talk to you- fuck, I can't even look at you.."

"..Please..." Her voice becomes shrill and high, strained by emotion and there are big, hot tears rolling down her face and he's walking out and she can feel her world collapsing around her. The images of the dead burn into her conscience, burrowing into her soul as signs of her weakness- of her stupid, pathetic need for love- her insipid behaviour around the enemy. The door clangs shut, the sound cutting into that heavy silence and the shards fall around her, as she struggles to stand. Her hand flies out to grab the table and the grief is a real thing, battering her knees and weakening her body in sucha way that she can bear no more. She grabs the table, trying to steady herself and she's falling.

At some point, she hits the ground, sobbing.

* * *

Sasuke wakes to the sound of the rattling of keys.

It's the red-haired attendant. But that's not what surprises him. What does surprise him is the woman in the attendant's arms. The pink hair is instantly recognized and he notices the handcuffs around Sakura's delicate wrists. One who catches a glance of those hands would have no idea, at first, of the damage they have often done to the enemy's face and body. He shifts, wiping off or trying to wipe the dry blood off of his chin and sits up, his head spinning. So she's confessed. Or Naruto asked her and she couldn't lie to him. She never could lie to anybody. Except maybe herself. But what does he know? He's been gone so many years that he's sure that the woman he loves so much is not the same person anymore.

Sakura doesn't even struggle at the attendant attaches the handcuffs to the rail, setting down her limp body to the rail that is nailed to the wall. She doesn't look at him but casts her eyes to the prison wall, reading the little inscriptions of men who lost themselves to this prison cell and he wants to tell her that their loyalty, or the greater part of it lies with the Village, more than each other, or even their friend Naruto but he sits back, shutting his eyes because the sight of her so indifferent and yet so sad makes him feel...bad for telling the truth.

"...He will never forgive me," She says suddenly, abruptly and turns her head to look at Sasuke. He opens his eyes reluctantly to look into those haunting green ones. "..He will never forgive me..." She repeats it in a lower, more desperate voice and her eyes look wild, trapped in themselves. "...I.." She has no words now.

He blinks. Swallows, trying to moisten the dryness called his throat and his tongue feels heavy, thick and bloated as if he bit on it too much and spoiled it rotten. "I'm sorry,"

"Don't!" She snaps harshly and there's fire in her eyes. The fire he fell in love with lifetimes ago. "..Don't you dare say that crap," Her voice is harsh, low and scratchy.

"If it's any consolation, in time, Naruto will forgive you. He loves you too much not to," Sasuke says easily and it seems so odd that he should be imprisoned in a cell with Sakura in his own Village, after most of it has been burned to ash. There's no awkward blushing, or side-long glances. They're no longer children and somehow, this blatant fact makes him feel an acute sense of longing for yesterday."...He will forgive you. He won't kill you. Neither will Tsunade. Though you have be-"

"You don't know that," Her eyes are a little glassy, her mouth set in a firm, hard line. "..Things have changed here, Sasuke. Konoha is ash. There are more dead than alive. I have betrayed everything we every fought for. Or everything we taught. - there is no retribution to be found, Sasuke. I am a sinner and I will take the death I deserve for my sins," Her tone is hard, frosted at the edges with ice.

He chuckles, his laughter dry and mocking. "...Ever so noble, Sakura-you haven't changed a bit,"

"Fuck you," She snarls, turning away again and settling for the inscriptions instead of his wasted conversation.

He passes the hours observing the curve of her waist, noting how it dips into her hips and widens slightly and the milky colour of her skin reminds him of all the times he dreamed of her when Orichimaru sent the snakes his way. He watches how the different shades of light make her look crimson, or black, or candy-pink. They're longer than he remembers and he feels that pathetic urge to run his fingers through them but his hands are bound and he has nothing to give her but this emptiness and he's certain she has had enough of that. So he watches her. She refuses to look at him again and the hours pass slowly, slipping into one another and he loses consciousness for a long while.

When his eyes next open, she's sitting alert and her eyes are clearer than they have been in a long time. It's as if she's had some kind of an epiphany and maybe she has because her face is open, honest and her expression is neither hopeless, or sad or angry. It is just there. Her features all in place, expressionless and yet...full of expression. The light is brighter too, almost blue and he sits up, wiping the blood from his chin again but the action is futile because it's dry and crusted and it makes his skin crawl. He pulls at the handcuffs as if to convince himself that he's free even when he';s not and she looks at him momentarily before turning her attention to the cell's door.

It opens.

And there, there is Tsunade. She's wearing black, her robes fluttering around her feet as the evening air gushes in behind her. A promise of life and Sasuke takes in a long, hurtling breath of it before the cell door shuts once more. He notices Naruto standing behind the blonde woman and Naruto's dressed in black too. There's a katana at his hip and Tsunade seems to deliberate something in her head struggling before she casts her eyes at Sakura. Sakura looks back and Sasuke knows that she has practiced this unwavering gaze for the past however many hours he's been passed-out because she wouldn't be able to do this without practice. His vision blurs and his head is dizzy for moments.

The air is thick with tension.

"Tsunade-sama," Sakura begins in a calm voice, belying the turmoil within her and Sasuke can see how hard she's trying. He can see through that mask- he learned how to do that years ago.

"Keep quiet," Tsunade says sharply, her eyes flashing dangerously as her gaze shifts from her prized pupil to him.

"...Free him, Naruto," She murmurs quietly, looking down at the ground with a forlorn look. "...Free him because we are going to need him,"

* * *

Pein is acutely aware of how Sasori is eyeing his back but he refuses to back down. He has made up his mind and there's no undoing such a hard thing to undo. He turns around to face the puppeteer, his eyes cool and placated, as if the earlier comment didn't frustrate or anger him at all. He folds his arms across his chest, eyeing the red-head carefully, and the file on the table is like an elephant in the room. Pein shifts back, the shadows growing along the walls.

"You have no choice in the matter, Sasori," He says, fingers tightening on the top of his chair. The fire in the fireplace rises up and falls, black and dark in the room. "...You and Itachi and the team I have drawn up must return to Konoha to finish off the job and bring Haruno Sakura to me,"

There's a faint twitch in Sasori's forehead that gives his anger away. He straightens his shoulders, refusing to give into the urge of screaming. At anything. Or anyone. Or someone. Or something. It drives him insane, in his head- the fact that he is powerless and must obey the words of the one person he'd been trying so hard to impress and now suddenly abhors. "..Leader-sama...I..what I don't understand is why we must return. Why we must- why do-"

"It's not your place to question my orders, Sasori," Pein cuts in effectively, his orange hair glimmering crimson in the faint firelight. "...It certainly isn't like you to question me, either. Is everything alright with you? Itachi tells me...that you've been acting strange..ever since that Konoha burning.."

Sasori flinches visibly at the slight curtness in Leader-sama's voice. "...I am perfectly fine, Leader-sama. Itachi-san is mistaken. He reads too finely into the lines and finds the littlest of things wrong so I assure you, that everything is fine..."

"Then you will fulfill my orders?"

"To destroy the survivors and bring back the kuniochi?"

"Yes,"

"Of course, Leader-sama. If it is what you will and desire and it is for the betterment of our world, then I will deliver." Sasori bows his head even thought the action makes him want to curl up into himself and scream until maybe, something or somebody out there hears his pathetic plea. "...I am forever indebted to you, Leader-sama for bringing me back to life and hence, I will put this life to good use and serve you faithfully and loyally..."

Pein smiles just a little. "Very well," He pushes the file across the table. "..You have a month,"

* * *

They put them both in one house. Birds of the same feather flock together takes on a completely new meaning. The survivors all know that these two are the Traitors. They're the Betrayers. They're the Liars. They are to be avoided like one would avoid the plague and they're only to be talked to when they're being briefed about their mission for forgiveness that they never wanted in the first place. They're to be fed and trained well and they are to speak with the Hokage-to-be, Naruto, once a week about their progress and they have a month for their plan to be implemented. They are to avoid all social contact and inform Tsunade instantly if the Puppeteer should turn up in Sakura's life. They are not to step outside the house unless it's for Training or for the weekly time with Naruto.

Sakura doesn't speak to Sasuke at all. She walks around the house like a ghost and he understands that things will never be the same again. She'd expected punishment- death, at the very least and when she didn't get it, she was lost. In her head, according to Sasuke, her death was inevitable and she had given up. But this mission has given her to fight and he understands that she doesn't want to. She doesn't want to fight- not anymore. She wants to give in to the pain of loss and betrayal and her eyes are cool when they meet his everytime over breakfast. Since she spends most of her time in her room, unwilling to talk to or even look, he cooks for them both and calls her name loud and clear.

Dinner is a simple rice dish with some chicken and he thinks back to all the times he's had to eat out in the cold and this dish brings back the memories so quickly that he has to reach out to the table and hold onto it to steady his head. When she comes down, she's dressed in that flimsy dressing gown he found her in and she looks different. It's been four days since their confrontation with Tsunade and the haunted look has left her eyes. She is determined and calm. Her gown stops mid-thigh and her legs are long, curvy and well-formed. Despite everything, he finds himself drawn to the perfect, neat form of his former teammate and friend. Her hair is loose and wet and her mouth firm.

"..I don't want to work with you...but since we have no choice..." She takes a seat in front of him, looking at him indifferently. "...we must go over the plan and decide how we are going to go about it all..."

He opens his mouth to reply but she plows on, as if she's been planning this monologue out for the longest time. "...Furthermore, I want you to know that we're no longer children and things have changed. You and I are both traitors and the one rule I set is that we both don't refer to the past. Not anymore. Not ever. Hopefully, when this is over, we'll never see again..."

She serves herself and he sits there, unable to do much. He feels lost- afraid all over again and he watches her eat delicately. She doesn't say anything.

In the middle of it, he gets up and walks over to the kitchen, dizzy. The night is young and decadent from the window. He looks out, leaning against the counter and thinks about how he thought she'd still love him- how he'd steal her into a night very much like this and make things good again- how he'd talk to Naruto with his new-found honesty and tell him about the nightmares and the hell but now that he's here, in the eye of the goddamned storm, he has no words and his body feels loose, disjointed. He sucks in a shaky breath, unable to distance himself from the need to be with Sakura. And everytime he thinks of her, or sets his eyes on her, he remembers Sasori and that smirk and the ash of the dead.

There's a creak behind him and he turns around to see Sakura. She's approaching him and she resembles a vision, her eyes softer, her mouth curved upwards just a little.

She stops mere inches from him, looking up into his endless eyes and maybe it's because he looks as though he were aching, or drowning or because the moonlight makes his features look kinder, more humane or maybe it's because she can feel the chasm within her opening, swallowing everything but the emptiness but she leans up and presses her lips to his.

Somewhere between the insanity of it all, she tastes his tears on his mouth.

* * *

**A/N:**

_I think this one is pretty good. I'm hoping for swifter updates and longer chapters. But this does seem promising. I'm actually quite happy with this chapter. What say you?_


	5. IV: The Decadence of Sin

**Title:** An Introduction to Intoxication

**Summary:** "...You can't love me, can you?" His lips brush against hers, his voice husky and there's something like longing in his dark eyes. She pulls back a little, her hands pressing into his warm chest as she looks at him with those haunting green eyes. And she smiles this sad, broken smile. "...No, I don't think I can,"

**Type:** Multi-chapter, smut

**Pairing (s) :** SakuraxSasori, SasukexSakura, Others

**Warning (s):** Sexual themes, dark themes, abusive language and disturbing images.

**Note:** This is a sequel to Existence written for my most devoted and most beloved fan which will be mentioned later. However, this stands as an independent story and so the one-shot doesn't have to be read in order for this to be read and understood. I hope to God that you enjoy it.

* * *

**IV: **The Decadence of Sin

...

_"No evil dooms us hopelessly except the evil we love, and desire to continue in, and make no effort to escape from. "_  
― **George Eliot**_  
_

...

_"Each night I lie and dream about the one_  
_Who kissed me and awakened my desire_  
_I spent a single hour with him alone_  
_And since that hour, my days are layed with fire."_  
**― L.J. Smith**

**...**

_"..There is love in your body but you can't hold it in_  
_It pours from your eyes and spills from your skin_  
_Tenderest touch leaves the darkest of marks_  
_And the kindest of kisses break the hardest of hearts.."_

**-Florence and the Machine**

_..._

The kiss shifts from innocent, tentative to angry and wild. Her lips slant over his and she nibbles on his lower lip, making him groan involuntarily and his fingers travel up her back, tangling in her thick candy locks and pulling her closer and closer if such a thing were possible. The tears have dried and there's a fire, a terrible fire burning through his body and it makes him act differently- with this crazed abandon because he's wanted this for such a long time.

Sakura feels the fire- it's searing through her veins, immobilizing her thoughts and turning her into an animal in the heat and even though his hair are longer, darker- his touch more desperate, more wanton and he doesn't taste the same and his skin is more calloused, more firm, she feels her body giving in to it. Her skin is heated, her breasts heavy with desire and somehow, somehow, this feels right. _He_ feels right.

She pushes his shirt up, her small hands trailing over the firm skin of his chest and he rips his mouth away from her, panting, illuminated by the moonlight spilling into the kitchen and she looks up at him with those beautiful eyes.

His hair isn't red and his lips aren't the same- his face is a different kind of sculpted and his eyes are so dark they could consume her whole; his frame is more lithe, more defined and his touch is different, in a pleasant way. The longing in his gaze is palpable- it's a real thing and she can feel it burning against her skin, making her feel this need to give in to this senseless passion, this turning point and surrender herself to him. Him- this man with his midnight locks and unfathomable glances who looks at her if she's the free air he wants so much after years of captivity. This man who broke her heart all those years ago and tried to kill her in an attempt to stop her from saving him. This man, that she had wanted for so, so long. And now? Now, she doesn't know.

He shifts closer to her, hands traveling down the side of her body to settle at her hips, gripping her tightly. He leans down, pressing light kiss against her neck and she tilts her head back, giving him access to her soft, pale skin. She smells like blossoms. Her eyes flutter shut, her fingers knotting in his hair, tugging restlessly at him to deliver the pleasure that they both need- that they both _require_ so much. His tongue flicks over the tender skin, making her body jolt up against his, making her rub against him in all the right places and he closes his mouth over the skin, sucking lightly as she lets out a low sound of approval.

His free hand tugs off the gown and finds that she's naked underneath- completely and utterly naked. His slacks seem to tighten, his throat drying at the sight of her before, naked and wanton. His heart thuds like a drum behind his chest, and every breath is ragged, short- broken. He shuts his eyes, trying to dispel the need so that he can think clearly. This is Sakura. This is the girl he left all those years ago to avenge his clan, to reclaim his pride, to find meaning when maybe, maybe she was all the meaning he wanted all along. This is his teammate- his best friend, his classmate, his guardian; the girl who once would've thought twice about giving herself away to a man she didn't love- she didn't care for, either. Sakura, who looked after him when he was sick, who defended him when Naruto went mad and crazy, who shouted at Kakashi for being too cruel to him.

He leans down, his forehead resting against hers and the dim haze engulfing her lifts and she senses- she senses that something monumental, something different is happening here. She raises her head a little, eyes clearing up just the slightest. Her breasts drag up against his chest with each hurried breath she takes and there's the intoxicating smell of blossoms on the lining of her patent skin. His fingers- his fingers ache to trace over the skin, but he reels himself in and understand that he can't give in. Not now. Not..ever.

"...You can't love me, can you?" His lips brush against hers, his voice husky and there's something like longing in his dark eyes. She pulls back a little, her hands pressing into his warm chest as she looks at him with those haunting green eyes. And she smiles this sad, broken smile. "...No, I don't think I can,"

There's a trapped silence. They spend that quiet moment looking at each other- like, really looking and what they see is so different to what they thought they'd see. Scars and layers of protection that are wearing away, tearing and collapsing into each other. It's not a beautiful sight but it's a true one and it's enough to murder their hopes- their illusions and their dreams. Sasuke shifts back, eyes careful not to travel over her naked body.

"..I.." He trails off, his tongue heavy and thick in his mouth.

"..W-What are you doing?" Sakura blinks at his actions, flinching visibly when he looks at her with those tormented eyes. Her body feels cool, and there's something like shame, sadness in her eyes. In that moment, Sasuke sees the wounded, approval-craving girl he left behind and it hurts so much.

It hurts so bloody much. But he has to speak. He swallows the lump in his throat, casting his gaze away to the moonlight-drenched window, his body tense and his fingers curl into a fist, his head spinning. He can feel her gaze burning into the side of his neck, muttering something stupid and he feels so sad inside himself. "..I..I can't have sex with you, Sakura. I..I.."

"..Are you rejecting me?" Her voice is high, her eyes turning cold and angry and when he looks at her, she's struggling to pull on her dressing gown. "..Look at me!" She shouts in the same high, shrill, angry voice. "..You..have the fucking courage to look at me when you're telling me that you don't want to fuck me!" Her choice of words makes him wince inwardly but on the outside, his face is impassive, his eyes dark, indecipherable.

He looks at her finally. "...Fine, Sakura," His voice is flat, cold, impassive. "..I don't want to fuck you," There is poison in his tone. Acidic, lethal.

She's fighting with herself- he can see it. He can see her crumbling, falling apart inside and it hurts so much but he keeps his eyes on her. Her gaze is glassy, tearful and she looks like she might explode either, into tears, or into violence. He steps back again, hurting and hurting but not wanting to show it all. She gives him a final, permanent look and stalks away.

When he hears the front door slam, he sinks down onto the floor, as empty as the house around him.

* * *

She ends up crying right outside the house.

Huge, heaving sobs of ugly sorrow. She places a hand on her mouth, biting it to keep the sounds to herself and there's this chasm opening up inside her, swallowing everything except this poignant grief, this sharp pain that hits her in the gut, crippling her, pouring out of her eyes as tears. She grips her stomach, trying to keep it all in but it's pouring and pouring and she's crying like a child who's lost something close to it's heart. Her nails dig into her flesh and she swipes at her eyes angrily, sobbing, whimpering. Because it hurts. All of it does. Just the fact- the fact that Sasuke, Sasuke Uchiha rejected her- he has managed to hurt her all over again is enough to make her clench her teeth together to keep from screaming. And she wants to scream.

But the tears refuse to stop. They're slinking down her face, dripping over her chin, slobbering her gown and it takes her a while to get a hold over herself. The air is chilly, the night young and the moon shines down upon her as hopeful as anything. She lifts her head, wiping the tears away angrily and notices all the ash covering the ground. A sore reminder of her sinning, and the consequences. The hurt has shifted, turning rock solid in her chest, burying itself into her and she lets out a shuddering sigh, trying not to see all the destruction around.

Her legs take her towards Naruto's house. It's a twenty-minute walk. She blocks all the emotions- all the whirlwind of memories and sucks in a long breath, letting herself be taken to the one place she'd sworn she'd never go to. There's a light on in the living room, bottom floor and she hopes that he's alone. She can't do this if Ino's present. Or anybody, for that matter. She just...she needs a friend. Although, the idea of seeing Naruto and the pain in his eyes isn't exactly pleasant- it's a respite from all the games she's been playing with Sasuke, or...or, with Sasori.

She knocks.

It opens on the third knock and Naruto's there, dressed in his slacks and nothing else. His whiskers are prominent and yet subdued and his eyes are cool, hard. He must've seen her from the window.

"What do you want?" He asks monotonously, sparing her a careless, indifferent glance, taking note of her mussed-up hair and thin robe.

"I..can I come in?" She says nervously because they haven't spoken since the confrontation and everything has been just crazy.

He shifts, contemplating things she can't understand. "...What do you want?" He chews out his words cruelly.

"Please, Naruto," She looks up into his eyes and they're not familiar, or warm at all. "..I..just- I want to talk you," She crosses her arms across her chest, warming up her arms with her hands. "...Please.." She adds, afraid of what is to come.

He looks at her long and hard and there's so much hurt in her eyes that he can't bear it. Not anymore. He opens his arms and she falls into the familiar, warm, comfortable embrace, sobbing loudly. His arms come around her, hugging her close and he rests his head atop hers, silent tears slipping down his face. They're falling apart, together.

* * *

He can't fall asleep.

Sasori turns restlessly and her face is there- her healing touch, her trusting eyes, her willing body, her soft voice and he's certain that he can't face her again. Not after what he's done. He shifts again the bed, pulling out his katana and watching it glimmer in the faint moonlight.

He wonders to himself, then, about what she will be doing tonight.

Just thinking of Sakura hurts him.

* * *

Ino walks down towards the graveyard with her bunch of Cherry Blossoms. Her walk is slow, her form almost ghost-like. Her hands shake. Her eyes are teary. She takes her time, as if she doesn't want to come upon the graveyard where there is a smaller amount of bodies and a larger amount of ash. The gate creaks loudly when she pushes it open.

The moon is high in the dark, flawless sky and the stars twinkle mercilessly, mockingly as if they know something she doesn't and they probably do because they're up there and she's down here and maybe God tells them all the things he's got in mind for all those down here.

She starts at the corner. Puts one Cherry Blossom on every marked grave. Makes sure she reads the name. Tries to recall their face and when she fails, it's like a knife to her gut. She moves on, laying down the flowers and the night grows around her slowly and quietly.

She reaches Sai's grave and she falters, blinking roughly to keep the tears away. That's her friend there, ash and all, dead and gone and it doesn't seem real. They...they..no one was prepared for this. No one. Kakashi. And Hinata. With her soft voice, her thick hair, her warm hugs- she...she didn't deserve it. Ino feels her facade crumbling.

Between the thinking and the stench of cherry blossoms that reminds her of the girl who betrayed them all, she starts crying and can't seem to stop.

* * *

**A/N:**

How's that? Ha. Lots of more angst to come. We're about..halfway into the story. Their mission kicks off in the next chapter. Leave behind a review if you feel up to it! Smut coming through soon- don't worry. Thank you for reading!


	6. V: The Means to an End

**Title:** An Introduction to Intoxication

**Summary:** "...You can't love me, can you?" His lips brush against hers, his voice husky and there's something like longing in his dark eyes. She pulls back a little, her hands pressing into his warm chest as she looks at him with those haunting green eyes. And she smiles this sad, broken smile. "...No, I don't think I can,"

**Type:** Multi-chapter, smut

**Pairing (s) :** SakuraxSasori, SasukexSakura, Others

**Warning (s):** Sexual themes, dark themes, abusive language and disturbing images.

**Note:** This is a sequel to Existence written for my most devoted and most beloved fan which will be mentioned later. However, this stands as an independent story and so the one-shot doesn't have to be read in order for this to be read and understood. I hope to God that you enjoy it.

* * *

**V:** The Means to an End

...

_"I love you as certain dark things are to be loved, _  
_in secret, between the shadow and the soul." _  
―** Pablo Neruda**_  
_

...

_"Only people who are capable of loving strongly can also suffer great sorrow, but this same necessity of loving serves to counteract their grief and heals them." _  
― **Leo Tolstoy**

_..._

_"All that is gold does not glitter,_  
_Not all those who wander are lost;_  
_The old that is strong does not wither,_  
_Deep roots are not reached by the frost._

_From the ashes a fire shall be woken,_  
_A light from the shadows shall spring;_  
_Renewed shall be blade that was broken,_  
_The crownless again shall be king." _  
**― J.R.R. Tolkien  
**

...

They bring in Gaara.

Tsunade does, anyway, along with the approval of the newly appointed Hokage, Naruto and the rest of the Elders; however many of them still live after the Incident, anyway. Sand isn't happy with the order, but decides to comply because of the Incident, and the Old Allegiance. If anyone is bright enough, they can sense it. A war. Brewing. Slowly. Softly- almost nervously. But it's brewing and coming with a vengeance. Sakura senses it too- sees it in the way Tsunade holds herself, shoulders strong and eyes cold, in the way Naruto talks to the Village about avenging and death and there's no warmth in his gaze, it's in the way Ino walks around the wards, stopping every once in a while to talk to some stranger who no longer is a stranger.

He's exactly as she remembers. Tall, lithe and lean, with hair so similar to Sasori's and eyes the same blue-green. He comes to their house. Her house. The safehouse that she's sharing with Sasuke. Naruto must have given him the directions. She's in the same dressing gown she wore and her hair are spilling around her face, loose and unruly. Fingers clawing at the dirt as she struggles to situate the potatoes the Uchiha planted, she turns to find him there, dressed in black. The kanji symbol on his forehead is sorely familiar and that night comes hurtling back to her head, making heat rush to her cheeks.

"Haruno Sakura," Even his voice is the same. Dark, mysterious, low- with a thick edge of sensuality to it and she rises to her feet, her stomach knotting anxiously.

The afternoon sun highlights the crimson in his thick hair and she wonders if it still is as soft as it once was. "Gaara," She says politely, rubbing her hands together to dislodge the dirt stuck along her skin. "I was told you were coming,"

"I should hope so," He shifts, walking around the small plot of land in front of him before he reaches her, a few inches away and looks down at her,his frame tall and a little threatening. "...I've heard that you...are the traitor. Apparently. And your actions resulted in..." He pauses to gesture at the desolation around them. "..all of this.."

She steels herself, making sure she looks him right in the eye- still the same unfathomable gaze, the dark insinuations and whatnot. "..Yes, that was me," She shrugs, pulling the side of her gown. "...So you're here to help us train?"

"Us?"

Before she can answer, he comes out. Sasuke. She hears him only because of the loud thud of the door shutting behind him. He's dressed in a plain white shirt and black slacks, his midnight hair wet. Her eyes shift away from him only to save herself the grief of looking at him- of knowing what transpired last night and how he managed, after all those bloody years of resilience and defense, to hurt her. Efficiently. He comes down the front steps and Gaara looks from him to her.

"..The other traitor too?" He asks with the raise of a sleek, red eyebrow, his eyes crinkling lightly- the only sign of his amusement, of his mirth and Sakura wonders how the hell she's able to read his face so well, even after the gap of maybe...five years. She settles for an indifferent smile.

"...Yes, him too. You have to train us both," She says offhandedly and Sasuke approaches them slowly, offering Gaara a hand as he looks him up and down contemplatively, sizing him up effectively.

"Uchiha Sasuke," Gaara begins quietly, turning slightly to take the offered hand, shaking it firmly. "..Never thought I'd see you...here, of all places,"

Sasuke shrugs, eyes flitting to Sakura's face before making it back to Gaara's gaze. "..Neither did I,"

They look at each other calmly, quietly, thinking of no doubt how they'd once been rivals and how now they've been pitted together against a group of S-Class Nins who will so easily destroy everything in their wake. Or maybe they're thinking about how they've both played significant roles in Sakura's past, and now are the only chances for her future. How they'd defined and defied her all at once. She watches them, a tight knot forming in her abdomen as she thinks back to Sasori, to the rough calloused touch, to his terrifying stories, to his deep, desperate eyes- to the feel of him, the smell, the taste and it hurts. Her gaze refocuses on them- these two men and everything feels woozy.

"I've made some lunch, Gaara," She speaks to him, because he's a safer option- or, maybe not. When his eyes trail over to hers, she feels vulnerable and has to swallow thickly, sighing. "..Would you like to join us?"

Sasuke looks hard Gaara's face, then Sakura's, noticing the way she clenches her jaw, swallows thickly as if the words are getting stuck in her throat and the way her cheeks are dusted lightly with a flush and he seems to realize that this red-head has been a part of her life- the life he so easily cut himself off from. Gaara's lips tilt upwards just the slightest, his eyes indecipherable.

"Of course,"

They all go in quietly, before a slow hum of conversation starts up between Sasuke and Gaara and she heads over to the kitchen to heat up the simply curry. The rice is warm in its pot and she pulls out a bottle of sake because if she has to get through this afternoon, she's going to need it. Stirring the curry with one hand on the low heat, she pours herself a glass of sake and hums a soft tune Gaara once sang to her. The memories rush back into her head and this time she doesn't try to defend herself- no, she opens herself up to them. She'd been on a medical mission- collecting different supplies, inspecting hospitals and the like. He'd been the Hokage of Sand, and so she found herself spending her evenings with him. He was suave, intelligent and more than a little articulate- she'd been fresh off the pain of fighting Sasuke and almost being killed by him.

One night. One night of drunken stupor and a tight dress and everything had come undone. They'd been discussing, ironically, traitors and defenses and the Akatsuki and how things would take a turn for the worst if the S-Class nins got their hands on the wrong kind of information. He'd leaned in to wipe something from her cheek and then they were kissing and there was no stopping. Burning hands- arduous eyes, shaky exhales and the feel of him. She woke up at dawn to find herself entangled in him, hungover and sated. And she'd run. Right back to Konoha.

The memory sends heat shooting down the length of spine, making her clench legs together as she drinks down her sake, pouring another glass. She turns the gas off, pouring the curry out into three bowls. She tops it with rice and some parsley, before setting the dishes on the tray. Her body moves slowly, languidly and she feels just the slightest bit dizzy. They're sitting at the table and she hopes, she really hopes that Gaara doesn't bring up that night. That one night of forgetting and ache. Sasuke glances at her curiously and she flashes a bright smile that hurts to spread.

"Lunch's here," She says chirpily, putting the tray down and picking off the sake bottle and her glass before walking over to the other side of the circular table. She pulls out a chair, taking a seat.

"Sasuke and I were talking, Haruno-san," Gaara begins formally, putting in a spoon into his share of curry. "..and we shall start the training tonight,"

"If he is given permission, then Gaara's going to accompany us," Sasuke puts in quietly, spooning himself a morsel of the delicious curry, chewing slowly as he watches Sakura's smile falter just the slightest.

She takes a long slug of the drink, feeling parts of her chip and break inside. "How lovely,"

* * *

"For real, yeah?" Deidara asks, his long hair fluttering in the wind as he strikes another piece of flying wood with his katana, his eyes fierce.

"Yes," Sasori hisses as the wood splinters, breaking near his face and he hits out at another fly log, turning swiftly on one leg to attack another piece with his kunai, his arm deftly hitting one half of the wood before his blade slices through it. He spins around to kick away another flying debri, rasping out a cuss word. "..He wants me to get the goddamned kuniochi to him..." The wood hits his stomach, making him jerk backwards breathlessly before he slashes at it angrily. "...for I don't fucking know what..."

"What does Leader-sama.." Hack. "..want with.." Hack. "..a pink-haired medic, un?" Hack. Hack. Hack.

"Fuck if I know," He pants, ruthlessly hacking through another piece of wood, blinking to dispel the dust in his eye. "..It's a goddamned suicide mission, that's what it is..." Hack. Hack. Hack. Slash. "..They've got an alert out for the Akatsuki members and Pein wants us to go out there and get that stupid girl here..."

Deidara's eyes flash lightly at the use of their Leader's name and he realizes that his ex-partner is furious- absolutely livid and there's no remedying any of it. "..Leader-sama must have a sane reason for the mission, yeah," Hack. Hack. "..Don't get so.." Hack. "..pissed."

"..Why the fuck not?" He swirls around in a blur, hacking away at the wood being thrown at them, splinters flying all around them like snow. "..I'm in no mood for die, Deidara," He snaps angrily, hips twisting so that he can slash at another piece. He bends backwards, flinching as the wood shoots above him, narrowly missing his head. "..I.." He grates out."..am.." Hack. "..not.." Hack. "..ready.." Hack. "..for.." Hack. "..that.."

Deidara chuckles darkly, wood exploding before his face as he swerves to let a piece fly right past him. "You're not going out there alone, yeah," He wipes the sweat trickling from his brow furiously, cursing. "..We're gonna be there with you, yeah. Don't have to-" A flying piece cuts him off, making him turn and attack it with the blade. "-get so worked-up..."

"Whatever," is all Sasori gets to reply with before a sudden piece of wood hits him square in the face, knocking him out.

* * *

"Sasuke can take on his brother," Gaara explains calmly.

Sasuke's face is impassive, his fingers drumming on the mahogany and Sakura looks away at the golden sun. She remembers how different this safehouse seems at night- at night, when there's thick grief in your mouth and you have to keep from screaming. His rejection comes back as a terrible taste in her mouth and she takes a long sip of the sake, letting it burn down her throat. She nods, as if to agree with Gaara.

"..Y'all take on whoever you want," She says smoothly, quietly, her words slurring just a little. "..but let the Puppeteer be," She tips her head, letting her gaze meet Sasuke's fleetingly, before looking to Gaara. This red-head's expression is curious, inexpressive.

"Why?" He asks, trailing his fingers along the edge of the table and Sasuke's eyes burn into her face.

A shuddering breath.

"...Because I want to be the one to kill him," She speaks in a voice that isn't hers. "..I will kill Sasori,"

* * *

**A/N:**

Enjoying yet? The promised smut comes next...but the plot is thickening and new characters are raging here. Whew. Drop a word or two, if you can.


	7. VI: Things Left Unsaid

**Title:** An Introduction to Intoxication

**Summary:** "...You can't love me, can you?" His lips brush against hers, his voice husky and there's something like longing in his dark eyes. She pulls back a little, her hands pressing into his warm chest as she looks at him with those haunting green eyes. And she smiles this sad, broken smile. "...No, I don't think I can,"

**Type:** Multi-chapter, smut

**Pairing (s) :** SakuraxSasori, SasukexSakura, Others

**Warning (s):** Sexual themes, dark themes, abusive language and disturbing images.

**Note:** This is a sequel to Existence written for my most devoted and most beloved fan which will be mentioned later. However, this stands as an independent story and so the one-shot doesn't have to be read in order for this to be read and understood. I hope to God that you enjoy it.

* * *

**VI:** Things Left Unsaid

...

_"For there to be betrayal, there would have to have been trust first."_  
― **Suzanne Collins**

...

_"..The lights are on, but you're not home_  
_Your mind is not your own_  
_Your heart sweats, your body shakes_  
_Another kiss is what it takes.."_

**-Florence and the Machine**

...

_"Can I be happy living with your ghost?"_

**- Matthew Perryman Jones**

...

* * *

They set off at dawn. The sky's bright- red and pink and the road seems long, infinite, the weights of their burdens heavy upon their backs, making them droop with the heaviness of it all and it hurts to walk away from Konoha. To see it glimmer and fade behind them. Gaara walks in front- Tsunade has allowed him passage to this crazy mission and Sasuke refuses to look at her. Naruto didn't come to send her off- neither did Ino. Who wants to see the traitors go? Everybody. But the people who trusted these traitors, who loved these traitors, who looked after them and hoped for them- they want no part of it. The loss is an acute pain in the middle of her chest, making her struggle to breathe properly. Her fingers hurt from holding onto the katana too tightly and her heart is hammering. A confrontation could be just around the corner. Scouts have seen the Akatsuki stalking these very roads. She feels lost. Just a little bit. As if she hasn't walked this path before. Because she hasn't- not really. Not this road of redemption. This road of death.

Her eyes flit over to the trees, to the birds chirping away relentlessly and then to the backs of the two men in front of her.

What is she going to do if she comes across him? Her mission demands that she kill him. That her only chance at a future and a love, and a life is his death. Can she do it? Can she watch the man she loves die before her, her katana stuck in his chest, blood bursting in small spurts from the corners of his mouth? Can she pull out that katana when she needs to? When she has to kill him? When she has to finish what she began so many years ago, as a lost, broken and very foolish girl? Sasuke glances back at her and she manages not to flinch. Gaara chuckles at something the Uchiha says before slashing the air with his kunai, as if testing something out. The breeze picks up and for a moment, she's back to being a small girl, alone and afraid, calling out to her mother and hoping that the darkness won't swallow her. But now- now what she's fighting is majorly in her head and she can't defeat it. Nobody to help her.

"C'mere, Haruno," Gaara calls out coolly, crouching down to examine something on the dust-laden ground.

Obliging him, she runs up and stops just behind him, near Sasuke and looks over Gaara's shoulder. "..What is it?" Her voice is calm, unlink the way she's feeling inside. Tormented and stormy- as if the littlest thing will set her off.

"An amulet," He pulls it out of the soil, loose from the previous days of rain and little sun and the metal glints in the sunlight. There is an engraving of a snake on the metal pendant and Sasuke stiffens next to her- she seems to recognise the symbol, as if she'd seen it once in a dream and now is slowly coming to terms with the fact that it might be something important. She racks her mind, trying to sift through all the memories and find what connects the snake to her but it's a vain effort- a pathetic one, at that.

Gaara shifts a little, letting the sunlight catch the precious stones in the amulet, outlining the clean figure of the snake. The green glimmers; emerald, and the red in the eyes of the snake looks ominous. "Uchiha, you recognise this, don't you?" The Sand ruler says shortly, his tones slightly accusing and subtly cruel.

"Yeah," Sasuke says slowly, as if waking up. And maybe he is. "It belongs to my brother,"

* * *

Naruto laughs. Loudly. And Ino doesn't know what to do. Or what to say. So she shifts closer to him. He tilts his head, raising his glass of sake to his mouth and taking a long slurp. A loud, dragging slurp that is impolite and improper despite the circumstances. Tsunade throws a look their way as if telling them something but Ino can't decipher the loaded look and so she focuses her eyes to Naruto's familiar and yet, unfamiliar face. He's sad. She can tell. She knows that much. Sakura leaving, despite the monstrosity of what she's done, has done a number on him and though he thinks he's immune and unfeeling, he's hurting and he has no way of venting his feelings. He has nobody. Not anymore. One would think that the Hokage has many friends but he's made more enemies than friends with all his hard-cut decisions. His eyes are drowning in a sad, miserable shade of cerulean and his lips are downturned in a permanent sort of grimace that doesn't suit his well-meaning face. Most of the people he loves- or loved, have left him. Dead, or traitors- what is the difference? They're gone and he's stuck here, living with their choices and facing the consequences they should've faced.

Everybody- or those who are left, condemn him for letting Sakura and Sasuke walk out of the Village. They ignore the decision that Gaara is going with them to ensure that the mission is carried out, or the Traitors die trying to take their revenge. What kind of punishment? She knows that Naruto knew from the moment he learned the truth that he would lose the two people that meant everything to him. And he would have no choice but to send them to their death in a manner both humane and just. He knew. And it seems so strange that after all those years of trial, of love, of loss that they have to come to this. Did Kakashi ever think that his Team Seven would end up like this? That one would be a traitor? That one would lose her heart to the enemy? And that one would become the one thing he'd always wanted to be and hate himself for it because he'll make choices that will end up destroying him completely? Did Kakashi think of them when he was dying? When he-

She stops thinking.

The thoughts swirl confusedly in her head, cold and dark and she reaches forward for a glass of sake, taking it down swiftly, letting it burn her throat so that she's reminded that she still feels pain- that she still is alive. And perhaps, perhaps that thought should be of comfort to her but the only thing she feels is regret. Regret that she didn't hear anything when the fire began. That she didn't save anyone that night. That she stood by the flames and felt herself dying as the Village that was her world burned to ash. That everything went to hell when Sasuke left for revenge and Sakura grew herself another heart only to have it taken away ruthlessly. That Naruto grew up to become this person who would make too many choices and not have the strength (who would?) to understand the depth of what he'd done.

"Naruto," Maybe it's the way she says his name- like a sort of prayer, or a word of hope, a word of courage- something that means something, or maybe it's the crazed look in his eyes but he stops his violent, terrible drinking to look into her blue eyes. Her calm, still, desperate blue eyes. They look like dark shadows in the dim lighting.

"Ino?" His voice is dim, dull and it almost seems she's having a tough time breathing.

"Do you think," She swallows thickly, turning the sake in her glass round and round. "...that when we were born, the Gods- or the God, he just wrote our fate all down and all throughout our...lives," She stops again. "...we followed that fate- living this precedented life?"

Naruto looks different in this light. Handsome, maybe. Or perhaps it's the sake messing with her head. She's never imagined him to be incredibly good-looking or hot- that kind of vocabulary was never hers to use when it came to Naruto. Because Naruto was Naruto. Still is.

He sighs softly, surrendering to the cold world of sobriety. "I don't know," His tone is frustrated. "I really don't know," And perhaps this idea of fate and preconceived lives scares him, but there's a slight fear in the dark blueness of his eyes. "...I..the idea of having been part of this great plan of this guy up in the sky...is..just..terrible..I..didn't our choices define us? How can we be defined by choices made for us?"

Ino looks at him. Smiles softly, takes a burning sip. "Maybe we can."

He looks at her. The same away. As if hungering for something. So she reaches forward and seals his lips to hers, essentially preventing him from saying anything more.

* * *

They spot her.

He's busy straightening out his crossbow and when he hears their shout of triumph, his gut clenches nervously and he feels the sickening rise of bile up his throat, his body tightening in anticipation. Deidara gives him a sharp look, almost as if he knows what Sasori's thinking and the two of them- Hidan and Deidara shift apart, giving him an opening.

A deadly calm spreads over him. He takes aim, fixes his arrow and breathes in deeply. The air smells of her.

And he lets it fly.

* * *

**A/N:**

Excuse the shortness. Next update will be better. Thank you. Drop a few words.


	8. VII: Death, Blossoms and Some Skin

**Title:** An Introduction to Intoxication

**Summary:** "...You can't love me, can you?" His lips brush against hers, his voice husky and there's something like longing in his dark eyes. She pulls back a little, her hands pressing into his warm chest as she looks at him with those haunting green eyes. And she smiles this sad, broken smile. "...No, I don't think I can,"

**Type:** Multi-chapter, smut

**Pairing (s) :** SakuraxSasori, SasukexSakura, Others

**Warning (s):** Sexual themes, dark themes, abusive language and disturbing images.

**Note:** This is a sequel to Existence written for my most devoted and most beloved fan which will be mentioned later. However, this stands as an independent story and so the one-shot doesn't have to be read in order for this to be read and understood. I hope to God that you enjoy it.

* * *

**VII:** Death, Blossoms and Some Skin

...

_"Greed, envy, sloth, pride and gluttony: these are not vices anymore. No, these are marketing tools. Lust is our way of life. Envy is just a nudge towards another sale. Even in our relationships we consume each other, each of us looking for what we can get out of the other. Our appetites are often satisfied at the expense of those around us. In a dog-eat-dog world we lose part of our humanity." _  
― **Jon Foreman**

...

_"..Your lights are on, but you're not home _  
_Your mind is not your own _  
_Your heart sweats, your body shakes _  
_Another kiss is what it takes.."_

**- Robert Palmer**

...

_"Life is for the living._  
_Death is for the dead._  
_Let life be like music. _  
_And death a note unsaid." _  
**― Langston Hughes**

* * *

He falls.

There's no loud shriek- no defeated cries- no insipid shouting. There's just this loud, sort thud. The sound of his body hitting the dusty road. A cloud of brown- flittering, faded- rising up into the air, making them balk for a moment. In all her years of experience, she understands the noise that death makes. Little to nothing. Gaara's body is motionless and she's frozen, eyes set on the arrow that is poking out of his chest, embedded more towards the left than the right. For a long moment, it makes no sense. No sense at all. Everything is still and quiet and she thinks that maybe he'll get up. That maybe Gaara will shift and roll over and laugh. Her throat is dry and her eyes are blurring- tears of grief, or just shock of seeing someone just die so quickly...she doesn't know but there's a tight knot in her stomach and it hurts to breathe.

"Move back, Sakura," Sasuke hisses so quietly that she wouldn't have heard him if it weren't for the silence. The trees rustle lightly and she sucks in a shuddering breath, pulling out her katana and obeying him despite all her instincts not to do so. She doesn't trust him. She doesn't- she has to trust someone and Sasuke moves in front of her, body tense.

"..Step away, Uchiha," A voice comes out from the hood of trees and it's calm, deceptively so, perhaps and it makes her flinch. "...Step away from the medic," She blinks. The figure formulates before her, and she recognises the long blonde hair before anything else.

Deidara. His robes flutter around him ominously, the dark red of the Akatsuki symbol reminding her. Her stomach clenches and she can sense Sasuke's anger- this terrible, thick hatred pouring from his skin and out into the open, fresh air. It emanates dangerously from him and she notes the bow slung across Deidara's shoulder. Her eyes flit over to Gaara's motionless form, her eyes burning and she looks away to Deidara- the determined set of his mouth, to the way his eyes appraise her figure as if he were assessing some machine and wondering how it'll work, to the steely resolve in his gaze.

"Sasuke," She calls out softly and he whips around, almost half expecting there to be danger around her. She wonders, wonders if _he's_ here. If he's watching them like this and she knows that it has to go down without a fight- without a brawl, or so much as a drop spilt. Who shot Gaara? It's a crossbow's arrow that's ploughed deep into his chest- a different design to the one Deidara has with him. She shifts her weight to her left leg and sighs softly. "Sasuke, move away- I don't want..." She stops and looks up at the trees, movement catching her attention for a long, brief moment.

To her surprise, he obeys her and walks aside, as if giving Deidara permission to take Sakura. His blue eyes meet hers and she sucks in a breath at the brutal hatred bunched up in his gaze, tangibly real. "Look," She swallows, dropping her katana, earning a long, hard glare from Sasuke. "Let us bury Gaara somewhere and then, you can take us wherever you want, alright?"

Deidara's gaze never wavers and he walks forward, his arrows making soft sounds as they clang against each other. Sasuke makes as if to move and she calls out in a soft tone, warning him off because the last thing she needs now is another body. They want her and they can have her, but at her terms. She will go at her own terms. She will not submit like a fool but she not defy like a fool either. She values her life. She has a mission. She has the promise of a future, no matter how meaningless or broken it might be and she isn't going to waste it. Not now. Not ever. She has to go through with everything. What had Tsunade told her?

_Your only chance at redemption might be precarious but if you really do desire forgiveness, you will fight tooth and nail for it. And die, too, if need be. _

She doesn't plan on dying. Not yet. She shifts again, weary and looks at Deidara straight because she can't show her fear. It'll give her away. "Let us bury him and you can have whatever you want," She says quietly, slowly, her eyes focused on the blonde predator.

Something drops from the trees- three vast shadows. Dimly, she understands that they are people. Red hair. A flash of it, and as the faces become clear, she recognises the hazel eyes too. Her heart seems to quicken, her breath shortening as if something very terrifying has been put before her and she can feel her throat drying. Sasuke shifts closer to her, still holding his kunai as if it will defend him from everything. She tries to breathe properly but the air is struggling to get into her and it twists itself out of her in the form of wheezing breaths and this kind of behaviour can't be explain medically. His eyes are calm- impossibly so, as if he feels nothing upon seeing her and she tears her gaze away from him to the other two. The silver-haired man has a dark leer across his face, his violet eyes raking over the Uchiha and the other one is clearly Tobi; the orange mask being a dead giveaway. She thinks back to all the pictures she's seen of them and the silver-haired man suddenly seems ominous.

He's the sadist.

A cold trickle of fear slips down her back, her body clenching tightly as Sasuke shifts closer to her. She leans down, picks up the katana and digs out the small dagger at her hip, her heart hammering, her eyes burning and she has to fight herself to make sure she doesn't look at Gaara. Sasuke's arm brushes her, his hair grazing over the skin of her cheek and despite herself, she feels a frisson of longing- of sadness, that he ruined her even after all the time apart and that she still feels this burning ache to be with him, despite everything. She swallows, trying to dispel the urge to scream.

"Take Deidara," He mutters softly, so softly that it would seem that he's saying nothing at all. And maybe that's why none of the Akatsuki members say nothing- or do nothing. They remain there frozen, watching.

And that's when she lunges, with a low, deep-throated cry, at Deidara. With the element of surprise on her side, she's more than lucky and he goes down easily, her strength knocking the two of them down. She doesn't look back. To Sasuke. No, she swipes the knife instead at Deidara's face and he lets out a cry, as if to tell the others that things haven't gone down too well. He pulls up his arm, ramming his elbow into her jaw and making her lose her balance, tumbling off of his body and somebody's grabbing her legs, making her shriek in absolute fury and her body shakes, writhing as if to get away but the touch is like cement, yanking her back. She yelps when her head clashes against a rock, a low sound of pain leaving her mouth as her vision blanks.

Deidara must've kicked her.

When her eyes flutter open, she notices that it's Tobi who has her legs in his hands. He has the upper-hand but she has the strength and she whips herself without the support of her legs, her blades swiping through the air and he flinches, letting go of her legs and she's back on her feet. She runs at him with another loud cry, noticing that Deidara's coming after her with something large and brown, that resembles a tree-log too much and that Sasuke's busy fighting off the silver-haired Jashinist, and...him. Sucking in some much-needed air, she rams into Tobi full-on, sending him crashing into a tree as she spins around to face Deidara. His face is full of surprise. Bet he didn't expect that. Her kunai swipes at his hair, getting a few locks before he bends, hitting the back of her legs with the log, making her crumble and cry out.

She hits the ground with a thud, a moment of relief before someones yanks her up by her hair and despite her promise to herself not to shriek, she does so. It's Tobi- or Madara and the single most terrible pair of eyes meet hers, cold and irrefutable. He drags her along the ground, kicking her hip so hard that the shudders travel up her body and implode in her head, making her vision blur into greens and blues and browns of nothing. Hissing like a snake, she twists but it only hurts more and he throws her brutishly at the same tree he hit. Somehow, he has the strength to do it and the impact makes her howl.

Distantly, she hears Sasuke calling.

"Bitch," Deidara hisses, yanking her up by the collar and she realizes at some point someone punched her mouth and she's spitting blood that is warm and terrible. She shuts her eyes, trying to heal herself and he seems to realize that because he gets his arm around her neck, her back pressed to his chest as he puts her in a chokehold, cutting off her air.

Tobi comes up from the front, his eyes dark and empty. The next kick sends her into unconsciousness.

* * *

Sasuke screams.

He doesn't want to. But he has to let go of that terrible sound that has been brewing inside him for the past ten minutes. The pain is immeasurable. Indecipherable and it rakes over his bare skin, splitting itself into the nerves and inducing more agony into his bloodstream. It burns. It burns and he howls like a dying man- a man being burned alive and his eyes are drooping, his body ready to give in. But his mind is fighting. Fighting the plague, the pain and the agony to find some semblance control over himself. The tiredness floods his veins, thick and heady and he bites his tongue to keep off another scream, his blood tasting of iron.

And the pain is everywhere, burning in his head, through his fingers, right down his thighs and into his toes and his body convulses with the burden of it.

Goosebumps prick his skin and his tongue feels heavy, his body shuddering still. A blaze of new pain and he's howling like a broken man once more. Bleakly, distantly, he thinks of Sakura and where she is- if they set her broken arm, or if they let it be. If they're hurting her. If- the pain's back and his vision blacks completely. He lets out another low sound of agony, shifting, struggling to breathe and opens his eyes slowly, tears leaking from the side of them. His back hurts and his wrists are red, the rope cutting into the skin expertly, almost as if that were the intention all this while.

The face that floats inches away from him is his brother's and he feels himself cringing.

Itachi's trademark, cruel smirk is another blow. "Hello, little brother,"

* * *

She wakes up, her head throbbing.

She's dressed in a loose white gown- no underwear, no bindings and her hair seem to smell fresh, as if someone washed her up before putting her here. The room is dark, illuminated by this one dark light and she shifts to sit up, her body aching in all the wrong places. But she's been fixed. She does a regular check- noting that her broken bones have been put back in their places, her bruises gone, her skin unmarred and her head spins for a moment as she tries to think back to Gaara and how still he'd lain- how patient he'd looked in death and there are tears in her eyes, springing down her skin and making her body convulse tightly with fear. She's crying softly now, clutching the soft bedsheets of the bed and thinking, that, well, they smell familiar.

Like..._him._

Could this be his room? Coul- she stops her grieving, sucking in a short breath and expelling it through her nose, shifting her legs around and that's when her breath catches because he is there, sitting on the chair, his eyes emotionless and steady on her figure. He's dressed in black, melting away into the shadows and the crimson of his hair looks golden in the dim light. His eyes look more brown than hazel and she wipes the tears from her eyes angrily angry at Gaara for dying- angry for whoever it was who shot him- angry at herself for letting her guard down- angry at everything and anything because she needs a reason to be angry. She does.

He stands up and she feels herself flinch, sitting at the edge of the bed as if she might fall if she steps down onto the floor.

He walks towards her slowly, so slowly that she can see his expression change with every step. Battling between anger, frustration, hunger and just this tender sadness. Her heart has picked up and though her head is woozy, she can feel the electricity. Can feel the charge between them. The pull. And despite everything, she knows that if something happens, she'll give in. She won't be able to fight. Not now. Not ever. And it scares her so much. He reaches her in long, pregnant moments, hand reaching out to touch her and somehow, somehow, everything that's been forced into her flees her and she lets his fingers trail over her cheek.

Just this touch is peaceful- it anchors her here and she understands that the way she feels for this man is something terrible and deeply profound. Something she'll never feel again.

"So smooth," He says slowly, quietly and his fingers shift over her throat, pressing into her pulse point before trailing upwards and across her lips, making her breath hitch. His eyes shift up to hers, dark and deep.

Almost as if reading her mind, he leans down, his lips grazing over hers and she knows that she's drowning. That there is no way out of this abyss. Heat travels down her body, settling between her legs and she sighs against his mouth, pressing her lips against his more firmly.

And then, everything goes to hell.

* * *

**A/N:**

_Drop a few words. About..two or three chapters to go. And thanks for reading!_


	9. VIII: The Beauty of Poison

**Title:** An Introduction to Intoxication

**Summary:** "...You can't love me, can you?" His lips brush against hers, his voice husky and there's something like longing in his dark eyes. She pulls back a little, her hands pressing into his warm chest as she looks at him with those haunting green eyes. And she smiles this sad, broken smile. "...No, I don't think I can,"

**Type:** Multi-chapter, smut

**Pairing (s) :** SakuraxSasori, SasukexSakura, Others

**Warning (s):** Sexual themes, dark themes, abusive language and disturbing images.

**Note:** This is a sequel to Existence written for my most devoted and most beloved fan which will be mentioned later. However, this stands as an independent story and so the one-shot doesn't have to be read in order for this to be read and understood. I hope to God that you enjoy it.

* * *

**VIII:** The Beauty of Poison

...

_"Sometimes it felt like her life was a series of falls from ever-greater heights."_  
**― Scott Westerfeld**_  
_

...

_"I don't care if this will break my heart, _

_Please just fuck me 'till we disappear," _  
― ** Motionless in White**

...

_"It's everything you wanted, it's everything you don't,_

_It's one door swinging open and one door swinging shut,_

_'Coz some prayers find an answer and some prayers never know,_

_We're holding on and letting go..."_

_**- Ross Copperman**_

* * *

She wraps her arms around his neck, tugging him closer and his warm body presses into her with a familiarity that brings a slow burning heat to her body, making her clench her fingers in the tips of his hair, pulling him closer- closer than close could be. His fingers trail up her arms and he's more gentle this time, as if afraid to hurt her and maybe the caution is good because she is fragile-she can be easily destroyed. His touch is light, feathery and instills a soft heat within her skin, keeping her here and her head seems to spin with all the feelings he incites within her. She tilts her head, tongue flicking over his mouth and he groans involuntarily, fingers digging into her sides tightly as his mouth opens for her.

Again- that slow burn of heat and lust flaring in her stomach but somehow, this desire is darker, more lethal, and yet more tender.

He pulls away from her, breathless, and drops his head to her neck, making her head tilt back to give him more space. He flicks his tongue over the soft skin there, before pressing his lips to her pulse point and suckling on it slowly, erotically, his fingers trailing down to tighten around her thighs, dragging her body until their crotches are flush against each other. He pushes up her plaid dress and when his fingers brush over her naked sex, her hips buck, her lips parting for a low, dragging sigh that makes him hiss against her neck. She's wet and he can feel it on his fingertips, making him harden despite everything. Driving him crazy. Without warning, he pushes two fingers into her wet, slick heat and she cries out, low and soft, hips jerking so that his fingers sink further into her.

"You're so wet," He mutters against her throat, licking the soft skin there before grazing his teeth along it slowly, refusing to move his fingers and give her the friction she longs so much for. Her body tightens, tensing, and he shifts, nibbling at her skin. "...so tight," Breaths, hot and sultry, fall against her neck, making her squirm in need. He moves closer to her, his teeth working over her skin easily, turning her into a hot mess. "...does Sasuke know about this?" He twists his fingers inside her, scissoring them slowly and she cries out, hips bucking, mind hazy. "..about how tight and wet you are?"

She hisses out some foul word, fingers tangling at the bottom of his hair, tugging at him- making him raise his head, her hips restless as she looks up at him through heavy-lidded eyes. She makes a beautiful, arousing sigh- cheeks flushed, pupils dilated, breasts heaving with each struggling breath. "..Answer me," He snaps in the same dark, sultry tone,his fingers twisting once more inside her, pushing into her and pulling out.

"N-No...no..." She pants finally, body shuddering as she shifts again, trying to find a place comfortable enough for her. "..Sasori...please..." The look she gives him makes him harden further, nails digging into the side of her hip, tugging her.

He pulls his fingers out of her, eyes fixed to hers as he raises his hand to his mouth, tongue flicking out over the fingers and licking them clean, a cruel smirk spreading over his face she whimpers, cheeks dark red, eyes dark and arduous. Her eyes flit own to his mouth, then to his hand and then finally, to his eyes. And there, it's back- the tug, the pull and he can't ignore it. Her hands reach out, undoing the strings for his slacks easily, letting them fall to the ground and she pushes down his boxers. His hands come down over his, warm and calloused and she bites her lip as he helps her slide the boxers down. His large, thick cock springs up, and she feels her stomach clenching at the sight of it. Her eyes shift up to his eyes and the obvious, dark desire in them make her draw in a breath.

He wraps his long, sinful fingers around his thick shaft and starts to pump, stroking himself slowly, eyes never once leaving his. He watches the slight rise and fall of her chest, her nipples puckering with arousal and the way her lips part soundlessly for another shaky breath as she watches him touch himself- pleasure himself in front of her and the sight is both so unfulfilling and erotic that she bites her lip, trying to keep down a moan. Stealthily making his way over to her, he stops inches from her aching body.

_Back down, Sakura. Back down- he's the enemy and you have a shot; a chance,_ comes a voice from inside her head, shaking her lusty thoughts into a dark frenzy.

Her eyes betray nothing but her desire- her ache, her need to be with him and though distantly in her head, there is a war about choosing the right thing and the stupidity of what she's doing because he is going to betray her and she will never be happy with him, her body is aching- is calling, is singing this terrible song of lust and ache and she cannot find strength in herself to walk away. She admires the curve of his shoulders, the hard planes of his chest- the tempting dip of his hipbones, his long, muscled legs and her eyes find his, and the silence is long, claustrophobic, pregnant.

He reaches out to cup her face- a gesture so tender is makes her stomach flip. And when he smiles this sad smile, she's lost.

He pushes the tip of his cock into her slowly, his dark hazel eyes never once leaving hers and the breathless moment of staring at each other makes her feel a warm, dizzy need blossom in her head. She shifts her legs further apart, bucking her hips so that he sinks further into her wet, tight heat as her legs come around, coiling around his hips, pushing him into her and he groans softly, tipping his head and burying his face into the crook of her neck. She tips her head back a little, arching her back and he starts to move, slowly, achingly slow, tender and sensual all at once.

He thrusts into her at a slow pace, his hot, ragged breaths falling against her throat, raising goosebumps along the skin as her fingers press into his back, her hips meeting him thrust for thrust. Panting lightly, she lets out a low cry when he sinks his teeth into her neck, his finger trailing down and pressing against her clit, rubbing it tortuously and every time her walls clench too tightly, as if close, he slows down his thrusts to a lazy, sensual pace, trapping her hips with his hands, holding her down. She whimpers, her back arching as his finger presses insistently against her clit.

"..Sas..Sasori..please..." She whispers between ragged breaths, and it's almost as if a dam breaks- something cracks and then he's thrusting into her at a rough, furious, relentless pace, his finger rubbing her clit harshly as he works her into a frenzy, the only sound in the room being skin slapping against skin.

And just as sudden as his reckless, ruthless thrusting started, he stops, holding her down tightly, eyes searching hers frantically. What's he looking for? Doubt? He's found it- there, along the ridges of her gaze, burning through the desire and he leans forward, lips barely just brushing hers. "...Don't fight this.." He murmurs softly, his voice so unusually kind that it makes her flinch, eyes rushing up to meet his. "...Don't fight me.." His fingers run up her bare stomach, hands cupping each supple breast easily, thumbs trailing over the nipples teasingly, making her breath hitch. "...Give in, Sakura," He presses an open-mouthed kiss to the side of her neck, suckling on the skin and she's giving in, surrendering to the overwhelming ache, the insipid affection for him and forgetting everything but him.

Him, in this here and now. His musky scent swimming around her head- the hard feel of him throbbing inside her, sliding in and out of her, pleasuring her in the ways only he can- the flat of his chest pressed against her chest, raking over her nipples, making her gasp for breath as if she were drowning. And she is drowning- losing herself in him. In the feel, in the touch, in the smell and in the taste- he's in her vision, in her veins and in her head, making it hard for her to do much else but simply surrender to this. To this intense pleasure, to this raw hunger for him. Her hand rushes down to join his, pressing over his calloused fingers, helping him to make her reach that high and suddenly, she's crying out, her vision blacking as her release hits her- hard and fast. She cums on his cock with a low cry of his name, body convulsing with the strength of her orgasm and her hips buck, trying to draw out the pleasure, to prolong the bliss and make it hers to remember every time she thinks of him. Her eyes are shut, lips parted, cheeks dark crimson and he watches, rapt, as she comes undone.

He thrusts into her restlessly, his balls tightening, his cock throbbing inside her, wet with her arousal and he's pushing into her harshly, nails leaving marks on the sides of her thighs as the tension within him snaps. She wraps her arms around his neck, tugging him closer than close can be, and his stomach clenches and tightens before he gives in to the euphoria- to the intoxication that is her. He spills his seed into her tight, wet heat with a choked sound that is most likely her name, burying his face in the crook of her neck to find some refuge from the madness that she brings to his blood- to his head, to his heart, his body. His hips keep bucking, following that rhythm that has been in his bones for so, so long. His movements slow down, becoming disoriented and jerky before stopping altogether. They remain like that, slumping against one another, their mixed cum leaking down the inside of her thigh, pressing against his thigh and she sighs softly, pressing her cheek into his hair.

He doesn't look up- refuses to do so because if he looks into her eyes, he'll lose all the resolve he's had for the past few days and then he'll be lost. And he doesn't want to be lost. He remembers the feeling very well- a heart-wrenching need, an insistent madness that leaves him no peace, no respite from the sadness and he doesn't want it anymore. She shifts her cheek and he feels something wet land on his shoulder. Despite himself, he stiffens.

But both of them pretend there that is no mistake, and that is she isn't crying and that he isn't dying inside and that this- _this_ isn't really _goodbye._

* * *

"Look,_ Ino,_" He snaps a little more harshly than he intends to and he wonders what Sakura would say if she were in this position. "...It was a mistake, alright?" He rakes a nervous hand through his thick hair, eyes betraying more than just a little fuilt and hate for himself. His body sways lightly and he sucks in a breath, trying to understand the mess he's created in his head. "..I was drunk and sad and God-" He chokes a little on his words, sucking in a sharp breath as her hard gaze falls on his face. "...I..just lost Hinata and I messed up with you...and..."

She uses the silence effectively, her voice soft and controlled- as if she were still not angry with him. She's always been good at pretending. "..I understand. I know what we did was wrong and that we shouldn't have done it. We weren't in our right minds and we were grief-stricken and whatnot," She pauses for a smile that is so strained that it slices across her face like a blade, cutting into her skin, making her muscles bleed with the force behind it. "...I really get it, I do...so, if that's all...then can I head off?" She picks up her coat rom the couch, eyeing him warily.

His eyes are a stormy blue when they meet his, as if he can't understand why she's being this way and maybe, he can't and that's fine because she has her reasons and she's not going to give him the satisfaction of seeing her hurt and angry. Hinata. The girl with a soft heart- with her pale eyes, her paler skin and her generous love. Of course, Hinata. However, there she stands patient and kind, her face betraying none of the things she feels.

"Ino," He makes as if to walk towards her and she flinches, shifting back and he knows that something has changed between them. "..I..I really am sorry, you know," His eyes beg for her forgiveness, as if just another kind word from her will soothe the ravaging storm within him but she shrugs.

Too indifferent to care now- the walls are coming up, the defenses all up in the right places and her heart crushes itself in hopes of finding some place safe where she can grieve her stupidity too.

She turns around, with a casual wave that will come to haunt her over the years and walks out of the room, into the hallway, struggling with herself. She pulls on her coat before leaving the house, letting the door click behind with a soft thud that seems to echo loud and clear in her head. The morning is wild and yellowed- dappled with sun, decorated by the summer wind and she tugs the coat tighter around herself as if cold- because the cold inside her can never really leave, can it?

* * *

He screams again- the burning pain sinking into his skin, making him writhe.

They drive the metal rod into his forearm, blood leaking from around the roundness of the pole and he screams gain when he feels- no, when hears one of his bones breaking. Just a light crunch, that is amplified in his head like a warning. Then, there's the burn. The fire burns into his flesh, instilling another wide-eyed kind of pain that makes yell out at his torturer, somebody with a hood and a need to hit him every once so often. He thrashes, wrists bound to the wood plank that he's tied up against. The rope's not half as bad anymore and there's sweat pooling at the side of his forehead, trickling down the side of his face, dripping from his chin down onto his chest and he struggles with himself, tryign to stem down all the sounds of agony that are bottled up inside him.

The fire. The fire and it blinds him- it's dark and bright all at once, enough to make him wince everytime it comes close to his eyes. The hooded torturer pulls the flames away from his flesh, but his broken arm is tingling- numbing in order to forget the pain but in his head, it's all panic and lights and danger. His hair hang over his face, wet with sweat and bloody from all the beatings he's been given. The pole's yanked out and his bone snaps, his head lolling to one side, a slow trickle of blood running from his nose now. An old wound opening, no doubt.

He swallows the thick lump of blood and bile in his mouth, before trying to speak. He runs his tongue over his mouth, shuddering at the chapped state of his lips. "..P..." There's no voice in him anymore and there's the sound of a low, cruel chuckle as if his torturer is enjoying his weakness.

Could it be his brother? The thought is sudden- random, disjointed with all the other chasms in his head and he struggles, he really does struggle to open his eyes and try to see something that might make it more clear as to who is torturing him but his eyes refuse to pen. And his voice is gone- lost in the confines of his chest, every breath rattling through his windpipe, the pain all-consuming. He spits out the blood, body spent. And he tries again, eyes screwed shut, to speak. But his tongue is heavy and his breath is raspy, as if he's at his end and he hopes it is.

At least- at least, then, all this will be over. All this fighting- all this taking sides and trying hard and all this madness. All of it will be over.

The thought is comforting and he sinks into the darkness that calls out to him in his mother's voice, his eyes fluttering lightly before he's swallowed whole by something other than the pain.

* * *

"You made him human," Itachi says thoughtfully. His fingers throw the kunai up into the air, letting it catch the reflection of the fire and glint dimly in the light, before he catches it, the blade barely just missing his skin, and the handle lands in his palm, as if all of it were a a well-orchestrated trick. His long hair rest on his shoulders like shadows and he watches Pein pace up and down the hallway, a grim, dark look on his face. "You made him human and that was your first error..."

Pein scowls at his choice of words but Itachi shrugs, as if to say, _well- the truth does hurt. _

"And my second error?" He raises a sleek, crimson eyebrow, the piercing above it glittering in the dim lighting, shadows throwing a menacing look over Pein's unblemished face. He snarls a little, as if to tell Itachi to be careful with his words but Itachi's long past that. Long past fear and terror.

"...To send him as the betrayer on the mission, instead of one of the foot soldiers- the late accessories," Itachi pauses for effect, looking at Pein directly. "..He was hazy and tired of all his days of not being human. Hence, when you threw him into a scenario where a kuniochi as pretty as Sakura was involved, you effectively gave him something to live for. He was highly emotional- his hormones raging, his head a little more than messed-up and you sent him out there for something too complex for him to understand..."

Pein's face closes in on itself, his expression dull and indifferent- as if he were feeling nothing. "...You never warned me about his condition- about the after effects of the...jutsu.." He shrugs, as if letting the mistake fall off of his shoulders.

"I thought you were clever enough," Itachi replies easily. "...but you should have sent Deidara, maybe, or Hidan. They wouldn't have become emotionally vested, or involved with her. And the mission would be easier- lesser complications. Lesser causalities," He stops to consider something. "...and you made a third mistake today.."

Pein winces, growling at the back of his throat. "..And what is that?"

Itachi smirks, indifferent. "..You let the kuniochi be taken to the Puppeteer's room,"

* * *

He looks beautiful when he's asleep.

His hand lies on her stomach, the familiar touch sending a nervous shiver down the length of her naked body. She pulls the sheet over him and sits up, careful not to disturb him and her eyes never once leave his face. His eyelashes are tinged with golden- it's a new thing she's noticed and are long as they rest on the skin of his high- cheekbones. His wicked mouth is curved upwards, into this soft, tender smile and his hair fall across his forehead, crimson and orange all in one. His skin is unblemished- pale in the light, and she reaches across to push some of his hair off of his forehead, afraid still to wake him. She feels that tug- that inseparable pull inside her and she stifles a sob, shutting her eyes only to see his face there all over again.

Her eyes open, wet with tears and they're falling, slipping down her cheeks, onto the bare skin of his chest and she watches the muscles tense, before he sighs lightly, turning to lie on his back, deep in his sleep. She gets off of the bed, walking over to the table where his robes are. Her hands shake as she goes through the thick, black material. She doesn't look too hard at her hands, her vision blurred because of the tears and she finds it. The hard hilt of a kunai- there, in the inside pocket. She pulls it out and starts murmuring the lyrics of this song she heard a dying sing to herself in the ward. Like a robot, the tears wet on her face, she walks over to the bed slowly- as if trying to delay the inevitable and it's clear that she doesn't want to. She really doesn't want to. But she has to.

Everything has a price.

She leans over his peaceful face, her hands no longer shaking. Her eyes are clear of the moisture- no tears in there and they're set. Determined. Her lips are pursed in a deadly, hard-cut line. Her eyes roam over his features for the last time- trying to remember and forget.

Everything seems to blur and she's breaking- all the facade gone but she knows where the heart is, right where it is and how one must get at it to make it stop. She knows exactly where is, beneath all that muscle and bone and how she has to aim to get her target. Her tears are hot and salty and her hands shake but she knows and she's damned.

"...I'm.." She struggles with herself to breathe. "..I'm sorry," She whispers, her voice shaking.

And then she brings down the kunai, stabbing him where she has to.

* * *

**A/N:**

_We're very close to an end, my dear readers. I'm hoping this is good. I'm hoping the end is fair. Drop a few words. _


	10. IX: Killing Is Easy

**Title:** An Introduction to Intoxication

**Summary:** "...You can't love me, can you?" His lips brush against hers, his voice husky and there's something like longing in his dark eyes. She pulls back a little, her hands pressing into his warm chest as she looks at him with those haunting green eyes. And she smiles this sad, broken smile. "...No, I don't think I can,"

**Type:** Multi-chapter, smut

**Pairing (s) :** SakuraxSasori, SasukexSakura, Others

**Warning (s):** Sexual themes, dark themes, abusive language and disturbing images.

**Note:** This is a sequel to Existence written for my most devoted and most beloved fan which will be mentioned later. However, this stands as an independent story and so the one-shot doesn't have to be read in order for this to be read and understood. I hope to God that you enjoy it.

* * *

**IX:** Killing Is Easy

...

_"We are our choices,"_

_- _**Jean Paul Sartre**

...

_"This is what love does: It makes you want to rewrite the world. It makes you want to choose the characters, build the scenery, guide the plot. The person you love sits across from you, and you want to do everything in your power to make it possible, endlessly possible. And when it's just the two of you, alone in a room, you can pretend that this is how it is, this is how it will be."  
―_** David Levithan,**

_..._

_"We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful about what we pretend to be." _

― **Kurt Vonnegut**

...

_"Tell me now, where was my fault..._

_..in loving you with all my heart?"_

_-_** Mumford and Sons**

* * *

His eyes fly open and his pupils are too dilated- his irises dark red instead of their usual hazel.

Her breath catches, her legs tripping over something and she stumbles backwards, her arms flailing a little uselessly as she struggles- struggles to come to terms with the truth. The kunai's sticking out of his chest but there's no blood and he sits up just as her back hits the wall, her body trembling, her eyes watery. She wipes away an angry tear with an equally angry hand, taking a long, deep breath to calm herself. She shuts her eyes and opens them again, as if trying to dispel the picture of him sitting up- of their being no blood because there should be and she's certain she's gotten all the arteries that she needs to...so, where is the blood?

His crimson gaze lands on hers and there's nothing remotely emotional in his eyes. There's nothing in his eyes. His lips are pursed, his frown cutting deep into the smooth skin of his forehead and he looks thoughtful, contemplating something dark and cruel in his head. His fingers trail down over the skin of his chest and grab the kunai's hilt just as as his eyes trail up to meet hers.

"Did you do this?" His voice is even, a little wobbly and he pulls out the kunai, the blade shiny and clean.

Only curiosity keeps Sakura planted there- only that, and a little bit of longing, perhaps. The blade is clean? How..how could that be possible? Her eyes fly to the kunai, then back to his face, trying to decipher his emotions so that she can speak accordingly but there's no clue in his eyes, no clue in his frown, no hint in the way he stands- no hint int eh way he looks at her. There's absolutely nothing. She shuts her eyes and blinks rapidly. Maybe it's a hallucination. Maybe ti's the shock getting to her head. Maybe it's all in her head and when she opens her eyes, she'll find him dead and peaceful there. She's hoping he's dead. She's desperate now, her eyes leaking tears, her fingers clawing at her white dress.

"Did you do this?" He repeats himself, his tone even and cold. He slides himself off the bed, feet landing on the marbled ground with a light thud and he throws the kunai into the other hand, holding it tight as he walks, slowly- predatorily, towards her.

She shirks away, trying to curl into herself. "W-Why..." A lump in her throat, an elephant in the room- a dark thought in her head. "Why aren't you dead?" She whispers fearfully.

His eyes blaze a darker crimson. "I was never alive to begin with,"

* * *

His eyes flutter open and it's Madara's eerie gaze that meets his. He flinches, shirking away but there's no place to hide now and he has to face this fear- this terrible, clawing fear. Distantly, in some small part of his head, he wonders where Sakura is or how she is doing. Or what she's doing. If she's alive, at all. His head hurts and his arm is burning up, as if on fire but he holds back his curses- all his anger is chewed up in a matter of moments as he contemplates all the results of him getting pissed off.

"What do you want?" He hisses, surprised that he can speak because his tongue is thick and swollen and tastes of dried blood- his blood, of course. His mouth seems to hurt again and he flinches when Madara draws up a kunai, the blade flashing malignantly in the light.

"...Nothing much, Sasuke," Madara spits out his name mockingly, in different shades of mockery and amusement as he straightens up, his robes dark and ominous, brightened only by the presence of the crimson symbol. He glances around at the dinghy captive areas and then shrugs lightly. "..I need you to get up, though,"

"Get up?" Sasuke hisses, his face a picture of hatred and fear. He tries to sit up but fails, his arm failing him because it's broken and burning and his head spins as he tries to straighten his thoughts- tries to move in a way that doesn't hurt every limb in his body but the pain is everywhere and he can't stop it.

"It's your only chance," Madara says slowly, lazily, polishing his blade with expert ease, his long hair falling like dark wings around his face.

"M.." Sasuke trails off, unable to comprehend what is being asked of him. He tries to sit up again and grunts out a filthy word as a ripple of pain travels up his arm, making his body tremble.

"Your only chance to save Haruno Sakura,"

* * *

Deidara hits her.

He isn't supposed to, he knows, but when the vile words come out of her, he hits her square across the face, making her grunt out with pain. She stumbles back, blinded momentarily and he stands there, a little unsure of what he's done. His knuckles are reddened, his eyes dark with anger and he has to keep himself from hitting her again. She turns around, her green eyes furious with him, a light trickle of blood flowing from the side of her mouth.

"You piece of shit," She snarls in a deadly tone and there's a dangerous aura around her- this tickle of enmity and violence that makes him back up but not enough, because she's leapt across the small distance between them and taken him down with the brute force behind her shove. Crying out something, she punches his jaw and the strength makes him wince hard enough to make him bite his tongue.

Blood gushes around his mouth, making him gag and she hits him again and again, her knuckles doing good damage- enough damage to make him shout for back-up. Her body keeps him pinned in place, and one moment, he thinks he'll pass out from her endless hitting, and the next, she's three foot above the ground, dangling, screaming; her face dark red and her eyes dark. Sasori's face is impassive, as if he were contemplating a business deal and his crimson hair look black in this light. Deidara spits out the blood, grimacing and Hidan leers from behind Sasori.

"Let go of me, y-you..you.." She trails off, struggling in his grasp, trying to pull herself away from him.

"Don't fight me, Sakura," He returns evenly in a low voice, his breath (so real, so real, so real) ghosting over her neck, flooding across her ear, making her flinch despite everything and she feels that tug- that ache, that need all over again. The familiarity of his voice, the scent of his closeness- the very feel of him makes her stomach clench tightly.

And then she spots it- the kunai. The kunai she used. Glimmering, like a precious diamond- the blade pointy and sharp, heading towards her. His fingers pressing into the back of her neck, trailing down and his other hand curled tight around the hilt of the killing object. Too late. Too late. His face turns so that his eyes can look into hers and there's the tug- that terrible need and she hates herself for it. She hates it. She hates it so, so, so much. He's not..he's...his breath feels so very real. His touch is so real. His..he is so real. Right here, holding her, even then- so real.

"SAKURA, N-"

* * *

"NO!" He screams, blood filling his mouth.

His katana slices across Sasori, succeeding only in making the puppeteer flinch and turn a little to look back at who threw the weapon. Sasuke's blinded- blacking out, but he's focused on one thing and one thing only- Sakura. She falls to the ground, crumbling and he throws another kunai- a small dagger at Deidara, getting him in the shoulder. His aim is only this good because he's thinking- he's working, he's stressed and high on the adrenaline, on the fear. On everything. The force of his throw propels the blonde backwards, making him cry out and then Hidan's upon Sasuke, crashing into his weak side.

He hits the ground head-first, all out of weapons and he blacks out again for a long, tenuous moment. But there's a voice in his head, calling- calling, _Sakura, Sakura, Sakura, Sakura_..and he can't ignore it so when his eyes open, he jerks his elbow to hit Hidan's jaw which makes Hidan's head fall back with a dull crack. And then the Jashinist is raining punches down onto Sasuke's face. His broken arm is twisted at a new, uncomfortable angle and his body is charged with both pain and adrenaline, tingling in the most awful of ways. He cries out when Hidan grabs a hold of his broken arm and twists it roughly, making him black out again.

Then the weight of Hidan is gone and he can breathe- he can see, through that thick veil of darkness. The voice is there in his head, calling and pushing him forward and he forces his eyes open, ignoring that burn of pain as it crawls up his arm and shudders its way into his heart, clenching tight around his lungs and making him gasp blindly.

Sakura's got a hold of Hidan, her eyes unfathomable and she hits him hard in the stomach, her expression impassive as if she's shut herself out from everything. Sasori's standing by the side and his eyes are set intently on Sakura, planning his next attack, no doubt. The dagger's in his hand, his fingers wrapped around it lithely and Sasuke wants to get up- he really, really does but his body won't comply with him and he's forced to lie there in his blood, contemplating all the outcomes of this fight. They're outnumbered- there's two of them and four of them. Sasori- all intact, Deidara- pulling out that blade from his shoulder, Hidan- struggling with Sakura's strength and in the corner, dappled in the shadows, Madara- a dark smirk on his face.

"You fucking pinkette- piss the fuck off, yeah," Hidan snarls furiously, pushing her away and Sasuke finally manages to sway to his feet, blood trickling down the side of his face.

Sakura doesn't flinch but rams her fist into his stomach, making him double over before he kicks out her legs under her, making her cry out, grappling air for purchase she won't find. Sasuke takes a step towards Deidara, intent on stopping him but his body falters and he's falling. Falling, legs buckling under him, body swaying and hitting the ground with a loud thud.

"EVERYONE DOWN!" comes a loud feminine scream that isn't Sakura and then he's gone.

* * *

"Dead?" He mutters softly.

Tsunade nods silently, holding the tissue to her eyes, looking away. "..That's what our sources are telling us,"

"And are you sure we can rely on these sources?" He says in the same lost voice that isn't his own because he's the Leader and he should be stable and he should- he should...make the right decisions. He should- there are so many things he should have done and he didn't and now, here he is, weakened some more by the loss of these two people who meant the world to him.

"Certainly," She returns evenly, pushing her chair back so that she can stand up. The wrinkles across her forehead look more prominent than ever. "...what should we tell everyone? The rest of the village?"

He sighs. Can't break down. Can't break down. Cant' break down/ Can't break down. Can't break down And must not give in. "...We tell them that their mission was successful," He sucks in a breath of fresh, smoky air "...That they died avenging Konoha,"

* * *

They carry the two of them evenly. They're stronger than before. Karin has Sakura's arm around her neck, the girl leaning into the red-head, her breath short and her body weakened by all the emotional trauma, and the physical one too. Suigestsu carries Sasuke easily- the body of his former friend is weak and light; unusually and terribly light. They head down the dusty road with ease and relative familiarity because they've been searching these areas for the past week and are well acquainted with these terrains. Their destination is the Sand Village and they've got too much of distance to cover than they're accustomed to but these are extraordinary circumstances and miracles are welcome.

"Is she OK?" Suigestsu asks softly, his eyes peeled for any enemy attack. His blue hair look like purple in the sunlight and his face is scrunched in a pic true of discomfort as Sasuke grunts out softly in his arms.

"She needs medical attention but she's going to be fine," Karin replies slowly, surveying the desert drifting away in front of them. Their sources should be here soon- at this very spot, with the things they've been promised but she feels a slight, uncertain peel of fear trickle through her. What if they don't turn up? What if they don't come with everything she's asked? What if- there are numberless possibilities as to what could happen and she decides that she must think as positively as possible or her thoughts will destroy her before she can do her saving. "How is Sasuke-kun?"

"His breathing is erratic- he's not entirely conscious…his chest wounds are bleeding again but yeah," Her partner smiles this wry smile, his sharp teeth glittering in the light. "..he's going to be OK so long as your sources turn up with the things we need….they're our only hope, Karin,"

"I know that," She retorts sharply, dragging Sakura along because the pink-haired girl's legs have given way and weak like jelly, useless as legs. Her arm slips from around her shoulder and Karin holds onto the slight girl's shoulder tightly, hugging her close to her body and making sure that she doesn't slip from her hold. "We've to stop here," She gestures with her free hand to the tree to their left- the large willow sways in the wind, it's leaves trembling in the wind. "..This is it,"

Suigestsu eyes her for a long moment, as if considering all the options he has here and there aren't many so he comes to a rest, dropping Sasuke's body to the grassy ground and tugging his large bag off of his shoulders. Karin walks up towards the tree and crouches down, letting the pinkette slide down to rest her back against the large, thick trunk of the tree. The long, long leaves hide them from plain view and the evening falls around them slowly, easily with the reckless abandon of a loving child. It seems soothing- this lethargic sunset, the lazy spread of the colours of the evening into the day sky and everything, for a moment, seems like perfection. Suigestsu pulls out the packed food they picked up from some vendors on the way and strolls over to her, his gait slow, his eyes tired. And they're both tired. Tired of searching for the one man who brought them together and yet, ripped them apart- who gave them meaning and purpose and hurt them expertly. Hurt them in a way no one could. She sinks down to the grass, beside Sakura and pulls out her medic kit. She's little to no experience with patients and medicines but she's going to give Sakura a quick check. She has to-she must, for Sas-

"Eat first," Suigetsu snaps shortly, as if guessing what's on her mind and he crouches down near her, taking out the box and the smell of stew makes her flinch because ti's been so long since they ate- they've been waiting and waiting for this food but they'd decided to save up for Sasuke, for this. Her stomach flips nervously and she holds back a low cry because her stomach's crapping, flipping over and over, making it hard for her to focus on anything but that smell of food- that smell of roasted chicken and almonds and spice.

He offers her a bowl, and a spoon and a slice of some nutted bread. Her hand shakes and she thinks, No, I should feed them first….but her stomach refuses to comply with anything and she takes the heavy serving of stew that he gives her. He serves himself and adds some lemon to his stew, dipping a thick chunk of bread into it and putting it into his mouth, chewing it slowly.

"..Unghh…" Comes a low groan from Sasuke- he's lying in a the grass, face pressed into the dirt and his eyes are bloodshot, his pupils too dilated even in this light and the two of them look to him, still not moving. He blinks rapidly, trying to dismiss all the dirt that has collected in his eyelids but it's hard and he stops trying. He recognises the smell of Karin- that faint lavender in the air is her. He's sure of it and he doesn't know how. How..could it…

"K…Karin…" He groans softly, his mouth flooding with blood, old wounds reopening and destroying all semblance of healing in his body. His fingers claw at the dirt, trying to help him sit up but his arm feels as though it doesn't belong to his body and he falls to the ground with a loud thud, the fall echoing through his very bones, leaving them rattled. And agony. Burn. Burn. Agony.

She's at his side in an instant, bowl forgotten. Her touch is familiar- soft, encouraging (but not Sakura's.) as she strokes his forehead. "..Hush…I'm here, Sasuke-kun…I'm here," She says softly, her voice a dreadful lullaby that makes him feel safe and important all at once. Her fingers press into his forehead, easing the frown there and trailing down over skin.

"Di….di..Sakura?" Is all he can manage, his voice twisted and disjointed and Suigetsu is there too, now, his hands working through the medical supplies they have and pulling out the bandages they required. There's not many of them but he presses a wet piece of cotton to a bleeding scar on the side of Sasuke's face.

"She's fine," Karin murmurs, her fingers easing comfort into his papyrus, pained skin. Her eyes meet Suigestsu and they look at Sakura's motionless body, her chest rising and fall; the only movement that points towards her being alive. "..She…"

"Wh..what?" Sasuke recognises the catch in Karin's voice and he opens his eyes- somehow, his irises nearly all black, his lips a thin white line on his face.

Karin looks into those haunted eyes- those familiar, beautiful eyes and sighs softly, her face shaping itself into a picture of both sadness and pity. "…Sakura is with child,"

* * *

**A/N:**

_Very close to an end. I hope you liked this. More to come for y'all. Drop another couple of words. _


	11. X: The Ghosts Have Faces

**itle:** An Introduction to Intoxication

**Summary:** "...You can't love me, can you?" His lips brush against hers, his voice husky and there's something like longing in his dark eyes. She pulls back a little, her hands pressing into his warm chest as she looks at him with those haunting green eyes. And she smiles this sad, broken smile. "...No, I don't think I can,"

**Type:** Multi-chapter, smut

**Pairing (s) :** SakuraxSasori, SasukexSakura, Others

**Warning (s):** Sexual themes, dark themes, abusive language and disturbing images.

**Note:** This is a sequel to Existence written for my most devoted and most beloved fan which will be mentioned later. However, this stands as an independent story and so the one-shot doesn't have to be read in order for this to be read and understood. I hope to God that you enjoy it.

* * *

**X: **_The Ghosts Have Faces_

…

_"In one aspect, yes. I do believe in ghosts, but we create them. We haunt ourselves…"_

**- Laurie Halse Anderson **

…

_"Monsters are real, ghosts are real too. _

_They live inside us, and sometimes, they win," _

**- Stephen King **

…**.**

_"…And what was it inside you that love never satisfied?_

_The thing thread that held you…how did it come untied?"_

**- Jason Walker**

* * *

The cold rushes in around her, embracing her like an old lover and sending shivers running down the length of her back.

Her dark hair flutter in the evening wind and her bare arms are goose-pimpled. The robes flutter around her legs, a comforting feeling and she looks out to the vast expanse of sand before her. Suna isn't home but it's close to it. Close enough. The days are colder now- the nights blacker and she can feel the onset of winter plunging through the days and starving the evenings of their warmth. Soon, there will be snow and there will little to no sand to see. The wind reaches up into her black hair and tugs them undone, letting them fly in the cold air. She turns around and looks back at the house- at her home and feels that same stab of sadness.

Red hair. Red hair. Red hair. Those eyes. Haunting her mind. Ghosting over her very breath.

Aguri looks so much like him. Speaks so much like him. Hell, he even walks like his father. She can never go back to how things were. To who she was. To where she belonged. This is her place now. This is her home. And she hates it so much. She steps off of the edge, her robes long and dark around her and she walks down the paved path slowly towards their little house. The lights are all on, and she can see them playing on the carpet. Aguri with his crimson hair and green eyes, putting one block upon the other as the other man- the one with his black hair and secrets, puts a block onto his tower, laughing at the little boy.

Why, they almost look like family. Almost as if he...he..she stops herself from thinking that and pushes open the back door to step into the warmth of the house. Her house. Her place. She to keep reminding herself of that. Has to keep pestering her mind into believe that yes, this is her place and her home and that she...she belongs here. The dark-haired man looks up at the click of door and smiles unsurely. He's been doing that for the past three years continuously, as in hopes of hearing her voice.

But she hasn't got a voice. Not anymore.

* * *

He stirs the stew. And glances over at her pale face- wonders if she's in there, inside, somewhere. His eyes trail over the familiar features of her beautiful face and he sucks ina shaky breath, his gaze shifting to the little boy. Aguir's running around the fireplace, his hair a red fire and Sakura walks over to the stove and peeks over into the pot. Sasuke holds his breath, hoping-hoping, for anything; a sign, or a symbolic gesture...anything at all, but there's just the slight rattle of her breath as it ghosts over his hands and she shifts back.

Her eyes move up to his face and he finds himself staring into the depths of those haunting green. She licks her lips and he feels himself stiffen. "..We need to talk," is all she says, before turning and walking out of the room on her sure feet.

He turns the stove off, glances at Aguri who is too busy with his toys to notice anything and follows after Sakura, his mind churning over various ideas. The sound of her voice after maybe, four years of silence is terrifying. It's lulling and kind and yet, some part of him prefers the silence to this change in everything. His hand trembles when he reaches for the door handle and he hesitates, he falters and he hears Aguri crying out joyfully and he recognises that sound as one of triumph. He's probably completed one of his several puzzles. He pushes open the door and Sakura's sitting on the bed, dressed only in a towel.

She's about to go for her bath- he can smell the light, musky scent of shampoo in the air and see the steam billowing out of the bathroom. His eyes, despite everything, travel to where the towel's knotted, her skin both so soft and tenuous to look at that his stomach flips. Her black (dyed) hair rest on her shoulders, the strands cleared off of her face and her lips look more red than usual. She's chewing on her bottom lip and he feels his chest tighten, a jolt of lust curdling his blood before he relaxes his body. His face is impassive- he's learned that showing emotion around her will only cause harm. Harm to himself.

"What did you want to talk about?" He says slowly, crossing his arms over his chest and her eyes meet his. His breath seems to hitch at the palpable emotion in her gaze- a swirling mixture of love and loss and just, this strange kind of pity. As if...as if- no, she can't.

"About this," She murmurs softly. "About all of this," She gestures to the room and the steam rises higher up towards the ceiling.

"..I don't understand," He doesn't move from the door, resting his back against it and she gets to her feet, swaying a little and he's hit by a flurry of sadness.

"Thank you for looking after my son," She begins slowly, making her way over to him. His fingers clench tightly when she reaches him, inches away from his body. Barely there- barely just, and there's this mix of electricity and heat between them that makes him grind his teeth together. His head hurts. She tilts her head upwards, looking at him clearly- more clearly than ever before. "..Thank you for looking after me," She swallows, balking and he shifts back, but she's so close- so close, in his touch and yet, not there. "..Thank you for saving us," Her eyes drop to his lips.

He understands. He doesn't want to- not really, but he does and it kills him. This sense of understanding has a terrible price. Without realizing it, his head shifts down so that their noses brush against one another's. Their breaths mingle and her eyes are wide, afraid and his are dark, fathomless. Could even be empty. "...You can't love me, can you?" His lips brush against hers, his voice husky and there's something like longing in his dark eyes. She pulls back a little, her hands pressing into his warm chest as she looks at him with those haunting green eyes. And she smiles this sad, broken smile. "...No, I don't think I can,"

His lips kiss the side of her mouth and her breath is shaky, her touch feeble and strong all at once. She's intoxicating. So, when she does kiss him hard on the mouth, he doesn't stop her.

* * *

Naruto places the flowers on the graves and reads the names to reassure himself that he has the right gravestones.

Ino's standing at the gate, waiting patiently and wearing black. Fourth year of their passing and somehow, nobody can move on. The hole that Sakura's left in his heart, or the pain of meeting Sasuke and letting him go is still there in his head, making him squirm with the need to be rid of it. He bows his head and tries to remember the way Sakura smiled at him when he made a Ramen joke or when he tripped over his own feet to land into a lovely swarm of mud. He tries to remember how Sasuke would call him dobe and hit him around the head when he made a mistake. He tries to remember how Kakashi's visible eye would crinkle in amusement at his antics, or how he'd push Team Seven on towards excellence. He tries to remember the exact colour of Sakura's hair- or the dark tint of Sasuke's eyes, or even the faint outline of a smile on Kakashi's face.

But there's nothing but a void that swallows him whole.

At some point, he starts crying.

* * *

"Aguri!" She shouts, waving at her child and he laughs this little laugh that makes her chest constrict with emotion. He toddles further towards the sand, his little legs carrying him onwards and a familiar hand slips into hers.

Sasuke's touch is cold- colder than yesterday and she nearly flinches, but she forces herself to tighten her hold on his hand. Her eyes remain on her child as he runs into the sand, falling over with a loud shriek of annoyance and amusement. She nearly pulls away her hand but Sasuke holds onto her hand, stopping her.

"Let him learn," He mutters slowly and his hand slips out of hers, as if he's realized something. That this isn't right, no matter how much it hurts to let go of her. But he knows that he can't lose himself over her and when glances at her sad, drawn face, her eyes are hurt and bewildered.

_You had no problem fucking her. And now, holding hands is an issue?_ His mind seems to echo with that thought and he forces himself to breathe. Because she doesn't care the right way for him- because she's in love with a dead man- because she can't look at her son without remembering everything- because they've made choices they cannot undo...because he's tired of breaking and he won't let it happen again. He looks away from her and to Aguri, instead, trying to ignore the pain that flares in his chest.

Aguri turns back at him, and smiles a big, crazed grin, mouthing something.

It takes a while for Sasuke to understand that the little boy is saying _otosan. _

His eyes burn with the threat of tears and he looks down. She's walked up to him so softly, so silently that he hasn't noticed and she puts a small hand on his arm. He remembers her touch from last night and it hurts to know that he can never have her like that. He simply can't. She squeezes his arm slowly, her eyes dark and he lets his tears fall, lets himself loose.

"..I'm sorry," She mutters softly and it's an answer to everything.

He chokes up for a moment. Blinks and sucks in a calm breath. "..Me too, Sakura." Another shaky breath. "Me too,"

* * *

**A/N:**

_With that, we come to an end of a story that was only possible of one person and that one person knows who they are. It's not too great a story but I've tried to give it my best. Thanks to all those who've stuck around for this. Much love. /3_


End file.
